Oppressed by Love
by Jade-Ocean333
Summary: Jacob and Leah have spent six years struggling to survive as a pack. Told through Leah's swearing, violent, and somewhat depraved mind, a story of promiscuous vampire spawn, egocentric werewolves, and the fight to break free of the chains formed by love.
1. Prone to Occasional Lapses in Sanity

**Prone to Occasional Lapses in Sanity**

As a werewolf you had a formula in which to structure your life around. Substitute the facts for the variables, and congratulations! Here's your picture perfect life.

It was simple, really. Transform for the first time. Imprint on some poor, naive, vulnerable female. Marry her. Have mutant werewolf children with her. Never age, live for the rest of eternity, happy, sickeningly in love. Kill the occasional leech that tried to suck your tribe dry.

Happy rainbows and butterflies, right? Unicorns, sparkles, cheesy Disney movies, werewolf love – all of it made Leah Clearwater want to gag herself with a fucking spork.

Because her messed up life didn't _have _a formula. She didn't even have a fucking sketch, or outline, or instruction pamphlet. She had to improvise on everything, and most of the time it turned out disastrously wrong. Perhaps that was the point of her existence. Screw everything up, and live in permanent torment and misery.

Oh, the joys of being the only female werewolf in existence.

Of course it was even worse now that Sam and Emily were expecting their first lil' monster, and her Alpha was salivating over a hybrid tween, and Seth had imprinted on some supermodel from Nebraska.

Being unloved, alone, and bitter was okay as long as everyone around you was the same. When you were surrounded by people who could all be in some shitty musical, singing eternal love songs at the top of their lungs from moonlit balconies, it made it a hell of a lot more difficult.

Perhaps her life was just destined to suck. Leah had lost Sam, found an escape in Jacob's pack, then been forced to deal with his _constant _thinking about his repulsive imprint. The girl, (Leah could never remember the ghastly name bestowed upon the poor kid by her absurd mother,) occupied Jacob's every thought. Leah tried as hard as she could to control her temper and not phase, but no matter what she would lose it and then be forced to listen to a constant spawn monologue. Jacob was so whipped.

Leah stretched, and adjusted her legs that were currently dangling off a cliff. Thinking about Jacob's monster progeny obsession made her want to dry heave.

It was close to midnight. She had patrols soon, but Jake would get over it. Besides, he was probably so busy making sure specks of dust didn't land on his hybrid vampire freak's perfect forehead that he didn't care if Leah was absent.

God she sounded bitter.

Well, she _was _bitter. She was the only werewolf left that hadn't imprinted. Even Embry had found a seventh grader that tilted the universe for him. Leah had what – acidic memories of Sam and a poster of a shirtless Brad Pitt on her wall? Pathetic. Though the poster was hot.

She arched her back, and leaned on the heels of her hands. The moon shone down. She felt like an absolute idiot – a werewolf sitting under the moon – but didn't rectify the situation. She was too comfortable. Sitting in the cool night air, contemplating the shit-factors of her life was strangely less painful than the alternatives – discussing baby shower plans with her mother, or listening to Jacob yap about the leech offspring.

The worst part about spawn monologues were the occasional parts where Jacob would remember the little beast's mother, and go into glowing commentaries of Bella Cullen's mothering skills. First, Leah thought it was disgusting that her alpha had moved from mother to daughter the second _it_ had escaped the womb. Second, she flat out hated Bella. Any mention of her put Leah into an absolutely foul mood.

Bella Cullen was the anti-Leah. Just like in science, where there was matter and anti-matter, there was Leah and Bella. Bella whined, Leah fought. Bella cried, Leah beat something up. Bella giggled, Leah glared. Bella had a supposedly timeless romance, (Leah personally thought her lover leech was a bit controlling and sexually suppressed,) Leah had a broken heart. Bella had a surplus of fathers that she got to keep, Leah lost her only one. Bella had a whole family that doted on her, Leah had a preoccupied mother who loved Seth more.

Perhaps the most annoying of all; Bella adored attention. She would go out of her way to garner attention, while simultaneously claiming to be 'shy,' She'd cry and whine and go into breathless shock over the _stupidest _things, soak up all the attention loaded upon her, and remain dissatisfied. She declared she was introverted and quiet, but all she did was beg and plead and squander for hints of concern. It was sickening.

Leah, meanwhile, was honest with herself. She felt unloved and uncared for. She _was _unloved and uncared for. Nevertheless she kept the self-pity to a bare minimum while connected with Jake, and struggled to deal with the problem on her own. She may be a resentful, angry, and cruelly volatile bitch, but she wasn't pathetic enough to act like fucking Bella Cullen. She did have standards, for god's sake.

She laid back on the sparse grass, staring up at the starry sky. Thoughts of Bella Cullen soured her naturally unhappy disposition.

She felt a faint trembling in the earth. Confused, she pressed her palms flat against the ground. Then she realized that someone, or something, was running towards her.

Fucking great.

Couldn't those stupid wolves get it? She wanted to be _alone_. She was laying halfway off a cliff for a reason! But no, they all felt the need to just ruin her mood that much more.

Jake appeared out of the gloom, his human face looking both upset and frustrated. Leah stared at him from upside-down, a glare fixed firmly on her features.

"You mind?" he gestured at the space beside her.

"Yes," she snapped. It was midnight, it was _her _cliff, _her _spot, and her only time for peace and quiet.

"Thanks," he sat down. His broad shoulders were hunched, his brow furrowed. Obviously, something was wrong. Leah was not the type of person to throw sympathy parties and offer gems of advice for the most tricky of situations, so she sat up and punched his shoulder. She wanted him to leave.

He shot her a look, "What was that for?"

"For invading my space and looking absolutely pathetic," she punched him one more time for good measure, "what the hell happened to make you think it was okay to actually _talk _to me during my private time?"

Jacob rolled his eyes, "I'm your alpha. You should be prepared for me to talk to you regardless of the time if there's ever a vampire."

"Is there a vampire?" Leah demanded. As expected, Jake shook his head no. She smacked him again, "then go away!"

"Aw, c'mon. Please let me stay? I just had an awful day, and I'd rather hear your sarcasm then anything else." He pouted slightly.

She shoved him, "Alpha-Supremist, go _away_!"

His face fell, "Seriously?"

Jacob's face was so absolutely dejected, so forlorn, that Leah felt the one compassionate bone in her body thump the rest into submission. Her eyes softened, "Do I need to go angry Dr. Phil on your ass?"

He chuckled, his eyes empty, "Nah. Just . . . let me sit here."

"Fine," she laid back down, "but this is a one-time deal. Don't be expecting this to become Leah-Jacob time in the future. Got it?"

"Sure, sure," he laid down next to her, putting his hands behind his head, "never bother you ever again for any reason. Understood."

"Good."

Leah stared back up at the sky. She tried to fall into her previous line of thought, but failed to remember it with Jacob's steady breathing next to her. He breathed like a fucking elephant with mucus in its throat – wet, and heavy. As hard as she tried to tune him out, she couldn't.

"Your breathing is louder than your snores," Leah complained.

"My breathing?" he experimented slightly with it, "I'm sorry – should I stop breathing, just to give you a little bit more quiet?"

"Yes," she shot back, "quit breathing. Jump off the cliff. Give me my peace and _quiet_. This is the one time of day I don't have to listen to constant spawn gush."

Jacob was quiet. Then he coughed, "Um."

She glanced at him sideways. Then she opened her mouth, outraged, "No!" She gut punched him.

He wasn't even affected by her hits. Instead he turned to look at her with big, pleading brown eyes, "Please, Leah? I'm desperate."

"Funny, considering she's your fucking soul mate," Leah snapped under her breath. He pretended not to hear that, simply gazing at her imploringly.

She growled, "Will your voice be less annoying then your Darth Vader breath?"

"No," he looked at her blankly, "but please? I need help."

She sucked in a deep, angry breath, and refused to respond. He took that as assent, and quickly began vomiting up words.

"Okay, so you know how Nessie will be full grown in a year? She's been experimenting some with just like . . . I don't know, girl crap. She's a teenager, I guess. Anyway, she's starting to get interested in boys and -"

"Wait, wait," Leah interrupted, "what do you mean _boys_? She has one boy. She has you. You fucking _imprinted_, remember?"

He looked pained, "That's the problem."

"Oh. Funny."

"Yeah, so, the Cullen's have been encouraging her to try just talking to other boys and stuff. It's hard, you know, to have someone practically betrothed to you at birth."

"The _worst_," Leah said sarcastically.

"And she's been feeling like her choices were taken away. Of course I understand that one, and I don't even _have _romantic feelings for her yet, but she just told me, flat out today, that she doesn't want me around for a while," he closed his eyes in pain, "she wants to figure her life out."

Leah didn't even want to consider how depressed Jacob would be over however long the hybrid freak needed 'space.' She bit her lip, "She's not, you know, ready to marry you and have vampire werewolf monsters together?"

"That's the thing," he turned on his side to look at her, his eyes frustrated, "she's ready for boys. She said so. But she said she doesn't want _me _as one of them."

"Well it would be a little weird," Leah pointed out, "going straight from second Dad to best older brother to boyfriend. I mean, incest much?"

"Yeah, I guess," he squeezed his eyes shut, "I just don't know what she wants from me. She loves me, and having me around makes her happy, but she doesn't want me right now. She's trying to understand who she is, or something like that."

Leah smirked impishly, "She's what, like five, or fifteen? She's trying to discover herself. Maybe she'll go through a lesbian phase."

"What, like yours?" Jacob retorted.

She smacked him, "I didn't _have _one, asshat!"

"Yeah, sure," his grin wasn't as happy as usual, "but anyways. The Cullens asked if I could try to stay away for a month, and see how Nessie fairs. If she gets a guy she likes, then I'll be stuck in the big brother role forever."

"I thought you said you didn't think of her romantically yet," Leah pointed out skeptically.

"I _don't_," he looked pained, "but I don't want to a monk for the rest of my life! It sucks. It's like, I don't know, all my choices are taken away. I have one choice, and she doesn't even _want _me. Where's the justice in this?"

Leah could have gone off about justice. She could have ranted for hours about the injustice of _her _situation and _her _life, but she refrained. The idea of going on like that just seemed too Bella-ish for comfort.

Jacob sighed heavily and looked back up at the sky, "I'll be a wreck for this month, just to let you know. Don't expect the usual bunnies and daisies crap, okay?"

"I usually shove the bunnies and daises up your ass anyways," Leah said dismissively, "they're more annoying than your occasional spawn angst fests."

He frowned, "Could you stop calling her a _spawn_? It's insulting. It hurts her feelings."

She rolled her eyes, "Not a chance in hell. I don't _care _if the hormonal little monster gets upset."

"_I _do," he insisted, but then he faltered slightly, "but I guess I won't have a chance to for a month, right?"

Leah stretched and yawned, "Nope." Her lips popped on the _p_.

"Glad to see you're so concerned."

"Jake, honestly. If I showed a hint of concern you'd panic and send me off to the leech Doc to get me examined for some kind of mental crisis."

He chuckled, "True."

She sat up. She was getting drowsy, but she didn't want to fall asleep. The moon was bright, the ocean looked inviting, and she was hot. She and Jake shouldn't be allowed within ten feet of each other. The combined body heat was enough to drive her _nuts_.

"Are you going to jump in?" he asked. He sounded faintly amused, but there was still that annoyingly sad tinge to his deep voice.

"Yep," she moved gracefully to her feet, "care to join me, oh alpha-all-mighty?"

He shrugged, "Maybe. I need a minute to think though."

"Suit yourself," she took off her shirt and shorts, folding them carefully at the cliffs edge. Her sports bra and underwear worked well enough as a swimsuit. Jake politely looked away.

"Don't wallow," she ordered. And then she jumped.

As she plummeted towards the surface of the water, she thought she heard a faint, "Fat chance of _that_."

But then again, she could have imagined it. Leah was prone to occasional lapses in sanity.


	2. Eaten by Venomous Baboons

**I Hope You Fall in a Pit and Get Eaten by Venomous Baboons. **

Leah's worst nightmare consisted of Sam, Emily, a white dress, and a whole crowd of people watching her. Luckily for her, she'd already experienced it once. In a rather spiteful twist of fate, she'd get to do it _again_.

For a fucking _baby shower_.

Sue Clearwater had fixed up her house for the event, claiming that as Emily's Aunt it was her divine right to throw a party to celebrate werewolf procreation. Leah had hid in her room all day, pointedly ignoring her mother's demands to help with the decorating. Leah didn't _want _to see all the blue balloons, (it was a boy), or the streamers, or the wolf-decorated wrapping paper. She wanted to blast her music, blow out her eardrums, and die slowly on the hardwood floor.

But eventually she had to emerge. She was a werewolf, and her body required round-the-clock sustenance. It didn't do well with even a few hours without something to digest.

The party was in full swing by the time she finally gave up her battle against starvation. Leah glanced down at her ratty jean shorts and navy blue t-shirt, and then shrugged. Who cared what she looked like? She was just the pathetic ex-girlfriend moping in her bedroom that her cousin was pregnant. Nobody cared what she looked like.

She slid into the crowded living room, and then stopped still. Since when were _boys _invited to baby showers?

Leah had absolutely no experience with babies, except for the annoying arrival of her darling brother, but from what she knew baby showers were sort of a girl thing. No boys allowed. Save the unborn monster fetus from as many cooties as possible.

Yet every werewolf in La Push – all of which were male – were packed into her tiny living room. The wolves and their imprints, all cozied up and watching as Emily, wearing a white maternity dress, helped Sam tear wrapping paper off a ridiculously oversized gift.

_Ugh_.

She rolled her eyes and edged around the room, avoiding everyone's eyes. Only a

few people noticed her. All eyes were attracted towards Emily's nauseatingly glowing face and Sam's proud smile. Leah felt the familiar jerk of pain somewhere deep in her stomach.

Or maybe that was hunger.

Either way, relief would be found in the kitchen. She hurried to slip inside the tiny room, and then ripped open the refrigerator. Leftover spaghetti. Yum.

Like a true werewolf she shoveled it down her throat directly from the Tupperware. Her Mom would be pissed. She used to like to say Leah was 'civilized.' Now she preferred the term ' feral.'

Peals of laughter rang from the living room. Something funny had happened. Maybe Sam and Emily were planning their future careers as a double comedian act. Sam would act like . . . well, himself. His pompous arrogance made Leah laugh at him all the time. And Emily could imitate Bella Cullen pretty damn well – that would make everyone burst in hysterical cackles.

Leah grabbed an apple off the counter and slipped back through the doorway.

Again, a few people noticed her. Sympathetic smiles sprung onto their previously happy faces. She ignored them and made it almost all the way to the door . . . and then Claire screeched.

"Leeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhh!"

Okay, so the kid was cute. That didn't mean Leah couldn't rip her face off, right?

"Leah! Leah!" Claire ran away from Quil, and wrapped herself around Leah's legs, "I missed you! I haven't seen you since my birthday! I'm seven now!"

"I know, I was there silly," Leah put on a painful smile and patted Claire's head. The entire room had turned to look at her.

"Quil says you weren't here because you're mad at uncle Sam," Claire announced solemnly, "but I told him you'd show up because you live here! And I was right!"

Leah shot a glare-of-immediate-incineration at Quil. He winced.

"I'm in second grade now!" Claire continued happily, "Emmy says I'm the smartest little girl in my class. Did you know that?"

Of course she didn't. She didn't _talk _to Emily. She avoided Quil because he was connected to Sam and Emily. She did all she could to avoid situations like this.

"And Sam said I could help with the baby," she rambled on cheerfully, "I'm gonna be its sister! Big sister Claire. Like I have big brother Quil, Harry will have big sister Claire!"

"Cute," Leah mumbled. Where was the nearest escape exit?

"What present did you get for Sam and Emily and my little brother Harry?" Claire asked eagerly.

Leah didn't have a present. She didn't want to deluge the happy couple and their unborn kid with pointless crap that they'd never actually . . .

Wait, little brotherHarry? _Harry_?

She let her eyes go blank.

Oh _fuck _no.

Leah turned and stared directly at Sam and Emily. The room was quiet, expectant. She raised an eyebrow, "Harry, huh? Wasn't that my Dad's name?"

Emily looked petrified. Sam shifted uncomfortably, "We, uh, wanted to honor him. Emily was really close to him, as was I, and we just think he deserves to be remembered . . ."

It took all of Leah's self control not to phase on the spot and gouge out Sam's vital organs. She took a deep shuddering breath, then turned furiously and left the house through her front door.

"Leah?" Claire asked fearfully. The door slammed shut.

And Leah was off.

_Harry. Harry. Harry._

Her heartbeat, breathing, lunges – all of it fell into the same beat. Her father's name. Two syllables. The person she was the closest to. The one person who'd _understood _her. Gone.

And recreated by _Sam _and _Emily_.

Fuck no.

Leah had understood years ago that Sam and Emily only existed on this planet to ruin her life. The second she had given Sam her heart she had become vulnerable, and he had maniacally twisted and picked at the opening, taking every possible advantage, _destroying _her. Then Emily skipped along and had joined in on the fun. They had gotten married and shacked up while merrily drilling Leah's heart to pieces.

Here was just another blow. They were going to tarnish her brilliant, wonderful father's name by bestowing it on _their_ offspring. Her father had been furious with Sam when he had imprinted. He had been furious with Emily for being the imprint-ee. He had been on _Leah's side_. What dimension were they in to think he would _like _being the namesake of their grotesque fetus?

Screw them. Leah hoped Sam would fall in a pit and get eaten by venomous baboons.

She streaked through the forest, a gray blur. The speed was exhilarating, but she was too busy agonizing and seething and hating her ex boyfriend to notice.

But she did notice when Jacob's thoughts suddenly entered her head. Their little pack of two was all wolves now.

_Leah, come on. Slow down. Let me catch up._

She didn't answer. She didn't want to. She kept her mind blank and kept running.

_Emily's upset. She thinks you're going to go all AWOL like I did. _

Good. Let Emily be overrun with guilt. Maybe it would fester and turn into some type of actual disease.

_That's not very nice_.

She snarled, _Shut up! Phase back – I want to be alone._

Not going to happen. Besides, I have nothing better to do. The shower was getting boring, and I'm banned from Nessie, so . . .

_Well that just makes me feel _great, she spat in her mind, _since this is just you being bored, why don't you fuck off? I don't want to talk to you anyways._

Jacob was completely unaffected by her hostility. He ran faster. She could feel him catching up, so she sped up until she was a healthy distance away from him.

_Slow down! _

_No!_

He groaned, _Leah, come on. I can help. _

Not in the mood for a heart-to-heart Jake. I'm in the mood to go kill something, so if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find a family of cute forest animals to massacre.

He snorted, _Yeah right. You do have a heart, no matter how hard you try to hide it._

Ugh!

She moved so quickly that the forest turned into a gray-green blur. Immediate details were sharp, and her reflexes were good, but it was nearly terrifying how fast she was going. She veered east and tried to ignore Jacob hollering in her head.

. . . Slow down, slow down, slow down! I need to talk to you! It isn't nearly as bad as it seems – honestly. Just let me explain, okay? Its going to be fixed!

Leave me alone! She finally snapped. And in the same instant, she phased back to being human.

The quiet in her head was instantaneous, and gratifying. She sighed, and pulled on her t-shirt and shorts. She was glad she'd been able to hang on long enough outside her house to fix her clothes situation. Nakedness was not something she was comfortable with, especially with a sexually deprived Alpha being the only other member of her pack.

She took note of her surroundings, and then plopped down in front of a huge, ancient mossy tree. She leaned backwards against it and stared at the tiny clearing she had managed to find herself in. It was nothing special – just a small treeless spot in the middle of scenic nowhere.

The clouds swelled overhead, but did not burst. She rolled her shoulders back, closed her eyes, and tried as hard as she could to forget the worst nightmare she had just endured.

Harry.

It was useless. No matter what her mind was drawn back to the stupid shower, Claire's obliviousness, Sam and Emily's delight and distress. Maybe she was a masochist. Her brain only ever envisaged things that made her heart wither and her stomach clench.

Or maybe some higher being just got a kick out her pain. Oh – you're lucky enough to have a deceased father, an MIA true love, and an angelic cousin who used to practically be your sister? How about we make your cousin and lover become soul mates, and parade your dead father in front of you at every opportune moment! And just for the hell of it – we'll make you an absolutely acidic, harpy-like bitch so that no one else will ever love you! Ha ha HA!

Yep. Fate definitely enjoyed fucking with her.

Or maybe she brought it upon herself. Maybe she was naturally a bitter tyrant, and this was karma's way of coming full circle. Here Leah – have a heaping dish full of what you deserve. Bon fucking appetite.

Jacob had it exactly right. Life sucks, and then you die.

It felt like hours later, though in reality it was probably only a few minutes, when Jacob trotted into the clearing in wolf form, his nose to the ground. He looked up, saw her, and his wolfy faced relaxed in relief.

She gave him the finger. He moved behind some bushes, phased back, and emerged with a tatty pair of cut off sweats on.

"Geez Leah! What the hell were you thinking? When you're human I can't find you!"

"That's the point," she growled. Her voice was weak and tired, she could feel her show crumbling.

"Yeah, but maybe I can help," he plopped down in front of her, "you didn't get the whole story. Will you listen?"

She glared at him pointedly. He raised his hands in defense, "Give me five minutes! I swear."

Leah only hesitated for a fraction of a second, but that was all it took. Jacob was running his mouth.

"Listen, Sam and Emily are wrong. They think the universe revolves around them, and as a part of that they thought your father was proud of them. Attached. So the think they have the right to use his name on their firstborn."

I hate them, Leah thought ferociously.

"Everybody else knows they're wrong," Jake continued, "your dad was on your side, but Sam and Emily can't realize that. And they thought if they remembered your dad in such a kind way, then you might forgive them."

She barked a short, bitter laugh. Jacob smiled wearily, "I know, right? Anyways, Sue is going to have a talk to them about it. She says its too soon, and it would be outrageously cruel to you. They're going to be forced to consider other names."

"They better," Leah growled, "they have no right to use my Dad's name for their fucking spawn. It would be worse than the travesty of your imprint's naming. Are they really so delusional as to think my father was proud of them?"

Jacob shrugged, "Emily, not so much. She's worried about you. Of course that just pisses Sam off because he doesn't think she should worry about anything while pregnant."

Ah. So the sadistic ex was now going to stop everyone from worrying about her. Great.

"Sam asked if I could tell you that he apologizes for any misunderstanding," Jacob continued dryly, "and that he wishes you would be a part of this child's life, as an Aunt."

"Fuck no," Leah interrupted.

"That's what I said," Jacob chuckled, "and then I phased. But he does want to talk to you about this – he thinks you need to 'sort things out."

"What is there to sort out?" Leah sighed, "Its been what – seven years? I just hate being constantly reminded of them. And their little cubs. The fact that they're sullying my father's memory doesn't help much."

"We know," he smiled reassuringly, "most everyone in there was on your side. The name announcement hadn't really been made yet. Then you left, and everyone just started yelling at once. Kind of funny, actually."

Leah could imagine it. Sam and Emily, cowering, while much-deserved abuse rained down on their heads.

"Point is, you have every right to be pissed, but its going to get worked out. They'll be pressured out of it. And you can go on avoiding them, and remembering Harry in peace."

Leah considered this. Then she groaned, "I can't go back to my house now, can I?"

"Give it a few hours," Jake wrinkled his nose, "its probably turning into a council meeting at this point. Its all werewolves, or people in the know."

Her stomach growled. Jacob grinned, "I'm hungry too."

She stayed on the ground, looking at him wearily. "You promise that they won't name the stupid mutt Harry?"

He smiled, "They're getting so much crap about it, I'd say that's a definite no. Sue might have an aneurysm."

And I might become a mass-murder, Leah added mentally. She nodded, "Fine. Lets go get food."

"Gary's? I've got five bucks," he waved the money in front of her face.

She imagined the dinky little sandwich shop by the beach, far away from her house. It would be busy, but it would be better than returning to the baby shower from hell. She shrugged, "Fine."

Jacob beamed. No matter how old he may appear, he'd always have all the emotional maturity of a twelve year old.

They phased back to human forms behind the trees next to the beach. When they strolled out – clothes dirty, hair rumpled, Jacob shirtless – people stared. Leah didn't blame them. If she saw a couple of teenagers stumble out of the woods like that, she'd assume they were exchanging bodily fluids too.

Leah went to sit on the beach while Jacob got the sandwiches. He returned bearing two huge subs, four bags of chips, and two sodas. Leah raised an eyebrow, "Five bucks?"

Jake shrugged shamelessly, "I chatted up the cashier girl."

They ate silently, companionably. They were comfortable with each other. Five years of being a single pack had grown on them.

Leah remembered when she had first left Sam's pack. It was like life was suddenly worth living again. Even though Jacob was first an angst-ridden wreck, then a slobbering love-struck fool, even though Seth agreed to return to Sam's pack after a few months, even though she hated the stupid vampires, it was still better than being around Sam constantly.

She and Jacob had struggled and fought for the first two years. They were too similar – both proud, strong, and competitive – and they rubbed each other raw. Fortunately they also understood each other at a deeper level, and the antagonism eventually faded to good natured ribbing. Sure Leah was a bitch and Jake was a punk, but they were okay with it. They worked.

Now, it was easy being around Jacob as it was being around Seth.

Jacob took a loud slurp from his soda, and then chuckled quietly at something funny in his head. Leah ignored him, although she idly thought that it was nice hearing him laugh even when his vampire lover had told him to fuck off.

Speaking of, it had been three days and he wasn't nearly as miserable as she'd expected.

"Hey, Jake. I just realized – its been three days without your daily dose of lochness. Why haven't you turned into a puddle of useless goo yet?"

The grin slipped off his face. Oops. He looked at her sideways, "I've been trying not to think about it, actually."

"Oh. Sorry."

He watched the family next to them frolic in the sand. He sighed heavily, "I really miss her. A lot. I'm going to call Edward tonight and get an update, just so I don't go crazy."

"Won't he be pissed if you call?"

Jacob shrugged uneasily, "As long as Nessie doesn't pick up, I don't think it'll be a problem."

"Maybe the line will be busy because she's on the fourth hour of a teenage chatfest with some stupid jock from Forks High School," Leah said absentmindedly.

He sucked in a ragged breath. She glanced at him, "Oops - that was harsh, wasn't it?"

"Just imagining her around those stupid hormonal boys . . ." he shuddered, "she's way too good for them."

"And you're not a stupid hormonal boy?"

"I like to think I have Nessie's best interests at heart," Jacob snapped.

She grinned, "I like to think you're feelings for her are purely platonic."

"They are!" he insisted, "I mean – ugh. Its Nessie! She's way too young for any of that."

"Apparently not."

He collapsed his head into his hands, "Can this conversation be over?"

"No," she felt herself grinning. Annoying Jacob always put her in a good mood, "but anyways – you shouldn't call. It sounds like the vampires will castrate you if you don't give the spawn her month of sexual freedom."

Jacob looked confused and irritated at the mention of 'sexual freedom.' "How the hell am I supposed to know if she's okay or not if I don't call?"

"I don't know or care," she shrugged, "but if you'd like to be able to procreate later on in life, you might want to seriously stay quiet for a month. The leeches sound pretty damn adamant about this."

"They are," he muttered dejectedly.

"So just leave them alone," she stole one of his chips, "maybe they'll send you a postcard or something. 'Greetings from scenic Forks – where the leech baby's screwing anything that moves!'"

He groaned, "Stop it!"

As if she would pass up this opportunity. She had so much material on the leech progeny it made her giddy.

"Wait!" he suddenly sat up straighter, "I know how I can stay sane over the next month!"

"Indulge in a harem?"

"I can -"

"Hire James Bond to stalk the leeches?"

"Ask you to -"

"Find you a gay heartbreak support group?"

"Go over and see how she's doing!"

Leah stared at him. A couple beats passed.

"It would be perfect!" he jumped up and started pacing, "you're my beta, you can protect yourself, and you'd be able to bring me back information. All you'd have to do is go over and say I need a Nessie update, and they'd understand!"

"Are you fucking serious?"

"They said I couldn't see or speak to Nessie, but you're allowed to! They couldn't deny me this one thing – could they?"

"Are you mentally stable?"

He beamed, "Leah – you have to do this for me! Just tell Edward or Bella that I'm dying, and they'll tell you, and you can tell me, and I won't go insane!"

"You already are insane," Leah snapped, "I am not going to the crypt, I am not speaking to the prepubescent leech or whiny leech, and I sure as hell am not going to speak to the bloodsucking lochness monster!"

Jacob sat directly in front of her, and stared straight into her eyes, "Leah, please. You have to do this for me. You're the only one I know can go there and be safe. And the only one who understands why I need this information so bad."

"Not a chance."

"Leah," he grew more serious still, "you have to do this for me."

"No!"

"Leah!"

"No!"

And so commenced an epic debate.


	3. Blemish on the Butt of Humanity

**Blemish on the Ass of Humanity**

How the fuck did she end up here?

Out of all the places where Leah could have been guilted into going, the Cullen crypt was quite possibly the one least appealing. But somehow, she found herself climbing off Jake's motorcycle in front of the big, reeking white mansion, wearing actual clothes and a hellish expression.

Fuck Jacob Black, and his ability to make her feel like she was skinning a defenseless, feeble kitten.

She could hear them. The whole crowd of vamps was laughing about something in the living room. Maybe baby leech had learned how to tie her shoes, or something equally exciting.

She jingled her keys and stomped up the front steps, making as much noise as physically possible. Of course they'd probably heard her miles ago, but she felt the need to announce her presence.

Leah knocked. Everyone continued their happy conversation, but the Doc was kind enough to open the door.

"Leah," he greeted her warmly, not the least bit surprised, "what can I do for you today?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Can the spa – can the kid hear us from here?"

He shook his head no.

"Okay, so, um, Jacob sent me here for an update of sorts. He's going crazy, and he knows he can't call or see her, so he sent me to see how things are going," she rocked awkwardly on her heels, "she's alive, right?"

Carlisle nodded, "Renesmee is fine. She's just inside, would you like to see her?"

_No_.

"Sure," Leah plastered a smile on her features. She found it difficult to be a bitch

towards the Doc.

He opened the door wider, and she slipped inside. The vampire stench made her want to run screaming for fresh air, but she controlled herself and stepped purposefully into the living room. Seven vampires and a mutant freak looked up at her.

"Uh," she stalled.

"Leah!" Whiny leech exclaimed, "oh, I'm so glad you stopped by to talk to me! Jacob told you, right?"

Leah vaguely remembered Jacob asking her to go speak to an upset Bella Cullen. She also remembered snorting at the vampire's utter absurdity.

"Um, yeah he did, but that's not why I'm here."

Her face fell. Her lips puckered. Her eyes grew big. Was she seriously going to _cry _because Leah simply despised her? Or whatever the fuck vampires did – they couldn't shed actual tears.

Prepubescent leech quickly pulled her into his arms, whispering into her ear. Whiny leech kept her eyes on Leah, bit her lip, and then nodded jerkily. He kissed her, and then moved to continue sitting next to his teenage daughter.

The spawn. In the flesh.

Lochness had grown a lot since Leah had last seen her. She looked like a haughty, irritated teenager now. Her wild curls were braided back, she was wearing designer label clothes, and she wasn't completely flat anymore. Her eyes were suspicious, her manner self-aggrandizing, and her stature small. Her parents were both short – it appeared as if she would be blessed with vertical deficiencies as well.

She stared at Leah, as she always did, with a mixture of curiosity and resentment. On one hand, the spawn thought Leah was incredibly cool because she was the only female werewolf in existence. On the other hand, the spawn hated that the only female in existence was also the only other member of Jacob's pack.

"Hello Leah," the spawn trilled, her head titled slightly to the side, "it is nice to see you."

"Same," Leah lied, "er – can I sit down?"

"Did Jacob send you?" the spawn's eyes narrowed.

"No," Leah looked genuinely offended, "Jake's banned, remember? I just need to talk to your Dad about something."

It was weird to refer to prepubescent leech as a dad. He looked like an elementary student he was so young. She was taller than him, and she was a girl.

The spawn pointed at an empty armchair, "Please, sit."

Leah sat. The other leeches stared at her. The blonde supermodel one – Rosalie, or whatever – seemed to be the nicest. Somehow she had found out about Leah's menopause, and had been disturbingly nice to her ever since. Leah appreciated it, but was also utterly weirded out by it.

"Will you be having a mental conversation, or a verbal one?" the spawn asked, as conventionally as if she had asked Leah if she preferred chocolate over vanilla.

"Mental," Leah answered firmly.

Prepubescent leech stared at her expectantly. The rest of the leeches continued their previous conversation – something about South America.

Leah felt strange. Her thoughts were tentative, _So, uh, you know why I'm here._

He nodded. She continued, _And_?

Edward looked pointedly at the spawn, then glowered when she thought the word

'spawn'. She grinned, _I hate your family. I hate you. I am only here because Jacob is a little bitch sometimes._

He nodded in agreement. She stifled a laugh.

_Is she seeing other boys_?

Prepubescent leech looked pained. He shrugged, in a way that said he either didn't know or the situation was too murky to tell.

_Helpful, leech. Really useful. Does she miss Jacob?_

This time he looked smug, and shook his head no. Ouch.

_Does she expect him to be a big brother to her for the rest of her life?_

He shrugged.

_Are boys after her at school? Jake's worried she might be in danger at some point, or put in a bad situation. Of course she's an abnormal mutant, so it wouldn't be too big a deal, but . . ._

He nodded, but scoffed at the idea of danger. He was utterly confident in the spawn's abilities to protect herself and make good choices. It was disgusting. Leah almost hoped the spawn would have a rebellious phase, just to piss off her parents.

_How old is she – emotionally, mentally, or whatever? Like, right now?_

"Sixteen," he answered out loud. The spawn glanced at him, but then continued talking to her crypt.

_Has she shown any interest in a specific boy?_

Leech nodded dejectedly.

_And you don't approve?_

He raised a sarcastic eyebrow.

_You know – you're a bit possessive and creepy, _Leah commented casually in her head_, you'll be the kind of dad that bans her from PG-13 movies and doesn't let her eat candy on Halloween._

Prepubescent leech looked irritated. He shook his head no.

_Jacob would be a better Dad than you_.

Now he looked angry. Leah grinned. Antagonizing the stupid leech was almost as fun as pissing off Jacob.

_I like your shirt._

Smug superiority returned.

_I wasn't talking to _you_, asshat. I was mentally communicating to the Doc, who can't actually hear me. _

Now he looked pissed. Damn was he moody. Maybe he was PMSing.

Oops – he looked even more pissed. Leah bit her lip to keep from laughing, and turned to the vampire conversation, simply to distract herself.

The mom leech was talking, "Would it be safe to bring the whole family? I think a few of us should remain, simply for appearance's sake."

"_I _am going," the spawn announced, "this is _my _trip."

"If Renesmee's going, I am too!" Whiny leech looked close to tears, "I couldn't bear to be separated from my daughter! South America is simply too far away!"

The spawn looked flat out annoyed. Leah laughed quietly to herself.

"Me and Jazz can stay back," the little fortuneteller volunteered, "besides, Charlotte and Peter are visiting soon. We'll need to be here."

"But Alice," Bella whined, "you're my best friend! You have to come!"

Fortuneteller leech smiled, "Its okay Bella, you'll only be gone a week. I can reorganize your closet!"

Bella looked nauseated. The huge WWE wrestler leech laughed, "Aw, c'mon Bella! It'll be fine without Alice! You and I can wrestle jaguars."

Leah could not even pretend to understand that leech's mind. He was huge, brawny, and apparently liked wrestling with fucking jaguars. It wasn't _fun _to wrestle things with claws. But again, he was a vampire. If it led to blood, it was probably _super_ fun.

"If Alice and Jasper are willing to stay back, then the rest of us are free to go," the Doc put in, "I'll take a vacation from the hospital. We'll tell the school we're visiting family somewhere less shocking, like Houston, and everything will be fine."

"Will we be able to catch Charlotte and Peter?" Mom leech asked, "I do like Charlotte. She is such a dear."

"Probably not," fortuneteller leech said, "they're due to show up this weekend, and as you're flying out on Friday . . ."

Leah felt her stomach drop.

"Wait – you're leaving for South America _this week_?" she demanded.

All the vampires glanced at her. The spawn stuck up her nose, "Yes. Why? Is that a _problem_ for someone?"

Leah had to cover up quickly. Obviously the spawn wanted to hear that it would make Jacob sad, just so she could bust Leah for being a spy. "Uh – well, its just, don't people usually plan these sorts of trips years in advance?"

Whiny leech giggled, "The Cullens don't have to worry about money like _ordinary _people."

Wow. A really awe-inspiring show of tact.

Prepubescent leech was quick to speak, "My darling, our money is yours. You _are _a Cullen. You're a part of this family, now."

Again, Whiny leech looked as if she was about to burst into tears, "Oh – its still so difficult to get used to! I'm not good enough for this family! I don't deserve any of this!"

_No_, Leah disagreed, _you deserve all of this. Your freakish daughter, you're utterly annoying prude of a husband, the stench, the inability to die. You're a bloodsucking leech. You deserve all the perks that go along with it._

At the 'prude' thought, Edward turned to glare at her. She smiled puckishly.

"Oh, darling," Prepubescent leech turned back to his ridiculous wife, "look at you! You're a beautiful, talented, amazing vampire. You belong as well as any of us!"

She sniffed tearfully, though there were no tears. Leah caught two of the parasites – the twins, blonde leech and soldier leech – both rolling their eyes. She smirked. Even the bloodsucking parasites thought Bella Cullen was a blemish on the ass of humanity.

"Could you please be a bit politer to my wife?" Prebuscent leech snarled out of the side of his mouth.

Whiny leech looked at Leah, her eyes wide. Leah didn't even bother looking apologetic, or ashamed. Bella Cullen was absolutely pathetic, and it was time everybody else admitted it.

The spawn raised herself even higher, "Leah Clearwater, you are not kind to my mother!"

"No," Leah agreed, "I'm not."

Whiny leech gaped. "What did I ever to do you?"

"Its not what you did to me," Leah stood up, "its just who you are. You can't help it – you're naturally pathetic."

Bella had probably never been spoken to that way before in her entire life. Leah saw fighter leech and blonde leech hide smiles. The other leeches simply looked weary.

"I . . . I," she drew herself up, "I want you to leave this house!"

"Fine by me," she turned to leave, "Edward, you know what the situation is. Figure it out or I will rip you to small pieces."

"Don't threaten my husband!" Bella shrieked.

"Its okay Bella, I can protect myself," he sneered, "she wouldn't touch me."

"It's a figure of speech!" the blonde supermodel leech snapped at the pair of them, "quit being so dramatic you two."

Leah nodded at the blonde in thanks, scoffed one last time at the repulsive, ridiculous little family of three, and then whirled and stomped through the door.

The house was silent as she kicked the motorcycle to life, and then sped away.

Jacob Black, prepare to _die_.


	4. Sex Island

**Sex Island**

"They're _seriously _going to South America?" Jacob exclaimed for the ten billionth time, "South America?"

"Yes Jacob, South America," Leah replied, a notable 'duh' tone in her voice. She lay across his couch, watching him frantically pace his tiny living room.

"_South America_?"

"Do you _want _me to break your nose again?"

Jacob shot her a look, but held his nose anyways. She had arrived at his house in a black out rage, broke his nose in greeting, and then kicked him where no man should ever be kicked. A rather violent arrival. Of course he had healed in a matter of ten seconds, but the dried blood stained down his shirt supplied them both with a constant, satisfying reminder of the incident.

"Its just," Jacob ran his hand through his hair, bewildered, "they're taking Nessie to a different continent and they didn't think to tell me? Or invite me?"

"Actually, I was under the impression that the spawn was taking _them _down to South America. She probably wants to see Sex Island. Maybe even bring a few varsity football players with her."

Jacob had told Leah what he knew about Isle Esme, and its uses, and ever since Leah had referred to it as 'Sex Island.'

Jacob paled visibly at the mention of his imprint and Sex Island in the same sentence. "No way. She's only like, thirteen. That's disgusting."

"Sixteen, according to Edward," Leah corrected cheerfully.

"Not helping," he snapped.

She rolled over onto her stomach. Her shoulder-length dark hair got into her face, so she swept it over her other shoulder and looked at him pointedly, "What are you going to do about it? And don't you dare say I should tag along – I'm never going near the leeches ever again."

"Fine by me. Do you think they'd get a restraining order if I booked a ticket to South America on the same flight?"

"With what money? You're a jobless, uneducated, broke werewolf. You live off of your six year old girlfriend."

"Again, not helping."

Leah shrugged, "I'm merely pointing out the obvious."

"Well . . ." he trailed off, and then snapped his head up excitedly, "what if I phased now and ran there? I could be there by Friday. That's what, three days from now? I could do it!"

"You don't even know where they're going," Leah yawned.

"I could look up the current flights to South America, and see what flight they're taking! They put passenger lists online, right?"

"No."

"What if I called one of them and asked? Do you think they'd get a restraining order then?"

"Most definitely."

Jacob frowned, "How can I find out where they'll be in South America?"

Leah rolled her eyes, "I have a revolutionary idea. What if you _stay home_, give Lochness her four weeks of sexual autonomy, and try to keep your mind off of it?"

He gaped. Obviously the thought of not stalking the spawn to South America hadn't occurred to him.

"She doesn't want you right now Jacob," Leah braided a few strands of hair, "leave her alone. She'll come back and probably ask you to marry her, or something equally revolting and predictable."

"Or she'll come back a non-virgin, used, sex addict!" Jacob buried his head in his hands, "what am I going to _do_?"

"Quit wallowing," she ordered, "go do something productive. Look – your kitchen looks like hell. Go clean it."

The kitchen did look like hell. Jacob's sister, Rachel, had moved in with Paul a few months ago after the engagement party. The kitchen was stacked with dirty dishes, encrusted with strange colored, rotting food, that neither Billy or Jacob had bothered to clean since Rachel's departure. It made Leah want to smack them both upside the head and inject another x chromosome into their brains.

"What if she comes back and decides she _never _wants me around?" Jacob asked despairingly, "I'll never know whether she's safe or not! I'll go crazy! And she won't care, because she got sick of me."

"Do you act like a neurotic nanny around her too? Cause I swear, if you show this side of you to her she'll never speak to you again. The spawn will permanently move on."

He sank unsteadily to the floor, not hearing a word she said, "I can't handle this. I _have _to be with her. Or around her. I'm going to fall apart."

"I thought imprinters would do _anything _for their lady loves," Leah snorted sardonically, "including leaving them alone when the asked."

"But for all of eternity?" he gazed hopelessly at her, "Leah, I'm _connected _to Nessie. We're permanently bonded. She's my _reason _for existing! Its been what, four, five days without her and I'm already losing my mind? I have to always be near her."

"Yep, definitely in need of a restraining order," she muttered under her breath.

"I don't _care _if she feels like she needs a boyfriend that's more suitable for her right now, as long as ultimately we end up together. Is that really too much to ask? I don't want Nessie romantically this second. I _need _Nessie to be around me this second. And eventually, we'll be in the same space and be ready for each other . . ."

Leah tuned him out, not necessarily needing to hear about his eternal love for the lochness monster.

" . . . I need to talk to Edward," Jacob finished finally, leaping up with unrestrained vehemence, "I'll tell him what's going on. Tell him that all of eternity is simply too much, and it _can't _be allowed!"

"Chill out," Leah snapped, "no one has said anything about all of eternity yet. Its been five days. Let them go to South America, and while they're gone you can go chat up the leeches left behind for information."

He wavered, "Who's being left behind?"

"The fortuneteller one and her mate," Leah fondly remembered the soldier leech, rolling his eyes at whiny leech's absurdity.

"Alice and Jasper?"

"I don't know they're names," Leah sneered, "it's the short girl who supposedly sees the future, and the torn up blonde one. Everyone else is skipping off to Sex Island."

Jacob looked relieved, "I like Alice. She'll tell me what's going on, and if I should commit suicide now, or wait until the end of the month."

"Melodramatic much?"

He looked her dead on, "I'm being absolutely serious."

She rolled her eyes. Imprinted people were so infuriatingly theatrical sometimes.

The three days before the Cullen family's supposed departure to South America were hellish for Leah. Jacob, not content with rehashing every possible scenario of his murky romantic future to Billy, had taken to following her around, a constant stream of worry spewing from his mouth. At first she had put up with it. Then she got annoyed.

"Go away, Jacob!" she screeched as she stomped around her house, tearing down streamers from the baby shower.

He held up a finger, "Hold on a sec, I'm almost done with scenario number nineteen."

"Ugh! You stupid, unreasonable, utterly illogical _mutt_!"

She crumpled up all the streamers and threw them in a perfect arc towards the trashcan. Then she set out for balloons, stabbing all of them with a pair of scissors in an almost vengeful fury.

Jacob invited himself over to dinner that night, much to the delight of everyone at Leah's house. Seth was the proud sovereign of the Jacob Fan Club, Sue loved Jacob for his kindness to her children, Charlie had always liked him, and Seth's new girlfriend – Amanda, or whatever – salivated over him because Seth did.

Fuck these people.

"Bella told me the Cullens were going to South America for a week or so, leaving tomorrow morning," Charlie mumbled over spaghetti, "you're going too, right Jake?"

He forced a painful smile on his face, "Nope, I'm sitting this one out. Plane tickets are expensive."

_And the Spawn ordered him to stay home, like a good dog._

"It sounds like a fun trip though," Charlie mused, inadvertently kneading salt into the wounds, "I hear they're making a stop in Argentina, and then their little private island down there. Nessie's so excited."

"I'll bet she is," Jake nodded; his smile entertainingly tight and strained.

Seth interrupted cheerfully, "Oh, Jake, Sam wanted me to tell you that he needs to meet with you soon. Some secret alpha stuff, maybe?" He waggled his eyebrows. Charlie flinched.

Leah rolled her eyes. Secret alpha stuff her ass. This was all about the imminent monster cub, and what its name would be.

"Thanks, Seth," Jacob shoved an entire bread roll in his mouth.

Amanda, who seemed like a nauseatingly nice, sugary sweet, perpetually optimistic girl, opened her mouth, "Leah, are you going to college this year?"

Ugh.

Leah plastered a fake smile across her features, "No, I still don't have enough funds. I'll be working at that little coffee shop until I save enough."

"I'm sure you'll get enough money soon!" she beamed, "where would you go?"

_Somewhere incredibly far away, abroad, where there are no werewolves, vampires, mutant spawn, or Sam and Emilys_

"Somewhere in state," Leah replied nonchalantly, "the pack needs me, you know, and its less expensive."

Charlie cringed again at the word _pack_. He had adjusted well to the land of horrors, but hated being reminded of it. It amused Leah. His daughter and inlaws were all vampires, his granddaughter was the modern Lochness monster, and his best friends were predominantly werewolves, and yet he couldn't stand hearing about it. How he had managed to stay happily oblivious for so long, Leah didn't understand.

Amanda turned to Sue and Charlie, her eyes dancing with light, "Where did you two go to college?"

Leah tuned out the boring, useless reminiscing about when the old people were young, and instead scrutinized Amanda. Seth shot her a warning look, but she ignored him and stared intently at the girl. She still wasn't sure Amanda deserved Seth.

But, then again, she practically _was _Seth in blonde, female form. Unendingly happy, eager, social, and utterly loveable. Another anti-Leah.

Amanda gushed, giggled, batted her blonde ringlets out of her face, and made Leah look like one of those dark, demonic wisps that always replace shadows in horror movies. It was like comparing Cinderella and the horrid dragon from Sleeping Beauty. Amanda blushed and never quit smiling; Leah sulked and shot excruciating rays of death out of her eyes whenever provoked.

Jacob cleared his throat, "Hey Charlie – when was the last time you saw Nessie?"

"Today, actually," Charlie looked all proud at the mention of his horrific grand child, "I can't believe how old she looks. Edward's going to have to start batting boys away by the hundreds."

Wrong answer. Jacob turned faintly purple.

Leah saved him, "Does she have a boyfriend yet?"

Charlie shook his head no. He put down his fork.

"I can't believe how fast she's grown," Sue marveled, "when will it stop?"

"One more year," Jacob replied automatically, "she'll be around seventeen, or eighteen."

"That is _so _cool," Amanda gushed, "could I meet her? She sounds amazing."

Leah and Seth exchanged a look. Leah managed to look both irritated and condescending, but Seth just looked pleading. He wanted Leah to like Amanda, no matter how ridiculous the hopes seemed.

"Er – maybe once they get back from South America," Jake glared moodily at his plate, "Seth can take you. They like him over there."

Leah was the only one that noticed the inflection on _him_. Unfortunately, she was also the one that cared the absolute least that Jacob was feeling down.

"Would you?" Amanda clasped her hands together, "I would love to meet her. And the vampires – they sound so interesting! And cultured!"

Leah had to suppress a snarl. Of course Seth would have only blabbed good things about the repulsive parasites. He'd practically brainwashed the girl into loving the leeches, forgetting to mention the part of how they could suck her dry at any moment. Leah was ashamed to be related to him.

"I'll come too," Charlie volunteered, his face slightly red, "I'll want to see Bella and Nessie once they get back."

"It will be _so _fun!" Amanda clapped.

Leah gagged, and Seth sighed in resignation.


	5. The Spawn Tour of South America

**The Spawn Tour of South America**

Leah bit the inside of her cheek so hard that her mouth filled with the awful, metallic flavor of blood. She spat on the side of the highway, wiped her mouth, and yelled once more in Jacob's ear, "Fuck you, Jacob Black!"

As usual, he ignored her.

Somehow, for the second time in one week, Leah found herself on Jacob's landfill-deserving motorcycle driving directly towards the leech catacomb. The only difference was that this time she clung to Jacob instead of the handlebars, her arms wound painfully tight around his midsection. Her goal was to squeeze the smartass right out of him.

Jacob had coerced her into joining him at the Cullen crypt, claiming that fortuneteller-leech and soldier-leech were the most dangerous of all of them, and he might need protection. Being his beta, it was all but mandatory that she accompany him on missions like this.

As he was quick to remind her, it had been _her _idea that he go visit the remaining Cullens and pry them for information while Nessie was tapping South American futbol players. Her response? A well-aimed sucker punch. His jaw had throbbed for a whole twelve seconds.

Nevertheless, here she was on a motorcycle headed into the heart of parasitic city. _Fuck _Jacob Black.

He leaned to the left, and shot straight onto the hidden dirt road that led to the mansion. "We're almost there!" he shouted cheerfully. As if Leah hadn't realized the fact.

She fervently hoped the two leeches ripped him to pieces for showing up at the house before the allotted month was spent.

He slammed the motorcycle to a halt in front of the porch steps, and then vaulted himself off. "Oy, shorty!" he called out.

The fortuneteller leech appeared at the porch within a second, her pointy face inquisitive. "Why are you here?"

"Nessie's out of the country, right?"

She nodded, "Of course."

"Then its okay?"

She shrugged, "When Edward goes into a murderous rage, I'll know who to point him towards."

"Atta girl," Jacob grinned, "can we come in?"

The fortuneteller leech glanced at Leah for the first time, "Sure. Leah, you're invited, if you wish."

Leah was about to politely decline – or rather, make an incredibly inappropriate hand gesture and stomp off into the forest – but Jacob's expression stopped her. She felt her face crack as she struggled to smile, "Thanks."

The fortuneteller leech led them into the large, airy living room that reeked of leech. Leah breathed through her mouth and prayed to god Jacob would make this as fast and painless as possible.

Her alpha threw himself casually onto their couch, "Where's your mate?"

The fortuneteller leech closed her eyes, smirked, and within half a second he was standing behind her, one hand on her shoulder. Utterly creepy. She opened her eyes, "Here."

"Jacob," the soldier leech nodded with a deep voice, "Leah."

She sneered. He was able to feel emotions, so she wouldn't bother to put on a happy-go-lucky front. He'd see right through her.

"Do you want to sit down?" The fortuneteller leech asked politely, pointing at a chair that stank of leech.

Leah wrinkled her nose, "No thanks."

"Suit yourself," she danced to the sofa, pulling the soldier leech with her. Leah stood behind Jacob's couch.

"Sooo," Jacob drew out the word, "any news from South America?"

Soldier leech chuckled, "Can't last a week, can you?"

"No," he whimpered, losing any traces of dignity he still had left, "I'm _dying_ here. Any information for me?"

Fortuneteller leech and soldier leech exchanged a glance. Leah narrowed her eyes suspiciously. Then fortuneteller leech turned and grinned, "Nessie's doing well. They visited Isle Esme, which she loves of course, and spent last night there. They'll stay there until Monday."

"Did she pick up a boyfriend?" Leah asked uncaringly.

Scary soldier leech rolled his golden eyes, "Like Edward would ever allow that to happen. He's worse than _any _authoritarian dictator. He'd line up all prospects against a chain link fence and shoot them execution style."

She tried as hard as she could to suppress her smile. She really did. But the mental image of tyrannical Mozart leech manically executing any possible boyfriends made the corners of her lips carve their way upwards.

"She's not so interested in boys right now as she is seeing the place where she was conceived," Alice explained, "she wants to feel like she belongs _somewhere_."

Leah tried not to gag at the idea of a child _wanting _to see the place where their parents got it on. How _disgusting_. Of course the child in question was a neurotic spawn child, so she was undeniably going to have a few issues. Still – it was weird.

Jacob frowned, "She belongs here."

Fortuneteller leech shook her head sympathetically, "She doesn't feel that way. You know that."

Jacob looked very much as if he didn't _want _to know that.

"Besides," soldier leech interrupted, "Nessie's always been fascinated with the South. She despises the rain – a trait inherited directly from Bella – and wishes to live in the sun for a few decades or so."

"She can't go south!" Jacob protested hotly, "My pack's here! Her family's here! Not to mention her _school_."

_Yes, because god forbid the little monster transfers schools_, Leah thought sarcastically.

"Jacob, you can't control what Nessie wants," the fortuneteller leech said gently, "if she wants to leave, will you really argue?"

He didn't even have to think about that one. His shoulders slumped, his head hung low, and he muttered to the floor, "No."

Leah looked with disgust at the puddle Jacob had melted into. She glared at fortuneteller leech, "Would you all move with her?"

She nodded, "Edward and Bella would, without a doubt. We'd all end up following. This family doesn't do well without each other."

"It would kill Esme," Soldier leech added, "she lives to see this family together."

Leah imagined the motherly, sweet, nauseatingly kind leech, who had already adopted Seth and Jacob both as second sons. The woman was ridiculous – she mothered anything capable of breathing.

"But . . . ." Jacob struggled with this, "how would that work out? Could I come? Will they let me?"

Fortuneteller leech and soldier leech exchanged another long glance. Leah narrowed her eyes.

"We'll leave that up to Nessie, Bella, and Edward," fortuneteller leech finally said reluctantly, "we're still not quite sure why they're banishing you now."

Leah snorted again. They all looked at her, and she bit back a smirk, "I thought Jacob was excluded because he was imposing on her sexual freedom."

Soldier leech chuckled, "That's part of it."

"Nessie wants a teenage fling," the pixie fortuneteller leech added, "Jacob gets in the way of that."

Jacob looked so sad and pathetic that Leah smacked the back of his head. He rubbed it, "_Ow_."

Pixie leech looked amused. "I thought he was your alpha."

"He is," Leah glared directly at her, "but when he's a wreck due to your vampire spawn, I tend to have to drag _him _around."

Leah was proud of herself. It was both an accusation and a reminder that she was capable of acting on her own, should this turn out badly. Soldier leech raised his eyebrows.

"Can I come here every day for updates until she gets back?" Jacob begged, oblivious to the tension in the room, "then can I call you? I know your phone number Alice, it would work."

Dear god. He had a fucking psychic parasite on speed dial.

Fortuneteller leech shrugged, "Sure. Edward will know, cause he can read my thoughts, but he shouldn't be too upset. We just won't tell Bella because she's even more neurotic about Nessie's wants than he is."

The mention of Bella and her tendency to stray towards neurotic-ness made Leah abruptly nauseous. Empath/soldier leech glanced at her curiously, "What's wrong?"

Leah figured she could be honest about Bella with these two. They seemed to be able to take a joke, so she grinned with fake enthusiasm, "Bella Cullen makes me want to dry heave!"

Pixie leech frowned, "Why?"

"Have you _met _her?" Leah retorted.

Soldier leech fought to maintain an indifferent expression. Jacob stood up, "Time to go!"

"Okay," Pixie leech stood up, "you'll be back tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Jacob fidgeted uncomfortably, "uh – do you think – is it possible to tell Nessie that I miss her?"

Leah rolled her eyes, "Out. Now."

He slumped, "Fine." The two leeches showed them out, and Leah dragged him back onto his craptasmic motorcycle. This time, she drove.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Leah's all powerful alpha was about as useful as three-week-old roadkill for the next four days. He followed her around like a puppy that had been kicked by its owner, his eyes forlorn and his shoulders drooping. Every day he would guilt-trip her into a quick leech visit, for spawn updates, and then he'd spend the rest of the day in her room moping.

She wanted to throttle him.

On the third day of the Spawn Tour of South America the pixie leech had good news. "They're leaving Isle Esme," she announced, "Rosalie wants to take her shopping in Rio, and Emmett wants to go to the Amazon to wrestle pythons. They'll be busy doing mundane things for the rest of the trip."

Yes, because wrestling pythons is the absolute epitome of mundane.

"Is that safe?" Jacob asked desperately.

Solider leech had sighed, "Her skin is more impenetrable than yours, mutt."

That didn't console Jacob. Nothing could console Jacob. Leah had to suffer with a dirty, greasy, sulky teenage boy wearing last week's smelly clothes following her relentlessly.

The worst part of it all was that the spawn's return to Forks wouldn't ease Jake's misery. In fact, it would probably aggravate it. Then he wouldn't even be allowed to harass Pixie leech for updates, and would probably spend even more time dying on Leah's carpet. Ugh.

Tuesday morning dawned rainy and overcast, perfectly fitting Leah's mood. Jacob had gone as far as to sleep on the couch in her _**house **_last night, claiming that there was no point in going home. Then he ate all her food and stalked her until she threw her hands up in exasperation and went with him to the Crypt.

"Alice! Alice!" he called out joyfully, barging through their front door, "Alice!"

He was like a junkie – trembling and crying until he got his daily dose of monster progeny news.

Leah followed him carefully into the house, and then went and sat lightly on a slightly less pungent chair. Pixie leech appeared in moments, "Hello Jacob, Leah."

Soldier leech was quick to follow. They watched as Jacob nearly cried he was so excited for news of his beloved child spawn bride.

"Oh – yes, um, Esme called," Pixie leech smiled, "they ran into a few friends yesterday near the Amazon. Do you remember Senna, Zafrina, And Kachiri?"

Leah remembered the freakish, albino, _stretched _South American vampires from the anticlimactic chat with the Volturi. They had been wild, and more intimidating than any of the pathetic little Volturi in their stupid matching cloaks.

Jacob nodded, "Nessie probably loves that. She always enjoyed Zafrina's pictures."

"They've been getting along very well," Soldier leech said smoothly.

Pixie leech entwined her fingers with her mate's, "Don't worry though, the three of them are content with a short visit. Nessie will return on schedule, without visitors."

Another worry line left Jacob's forehead. He beamed, "Brilliant. Maybe Nessie will be so happy from her trip to South America that she'll forget this whole 'space' thing!"

"Don't count on it," Leah deadpanned.

He rolled his eyes, firm in his happiness, "Did she say anything about me?"

"Er – no," Pixie leech half-smiled, "sorry."

Jacob sulked. Leah glanced suspiciously at Pixie's quick flash of guilt, but then turned to glue her alpha back together. She had a thing or two to say to the stupid spawn for making her deal with this pathetic, mopey version of Jacob.

Lochness would pay for hurting Jacob, and for forcing an enormously smelly, heavy burden on Leah's already overfilled plate.


	6. The Spiral of Goo

**The Spiral of Goo**

It didn't take much for Leah to decide she never wanted to imprint. Watching her proud, strong, mature alpha deteriorate into a heaping bucket of goo in the matter of six days without his vampire spawn pretty much solidified her conclusion. He was utterly unproductive, incapable of doing anything without the constant presence of his beloved tween vampire hybrid. Leah never wanted to be that dependent on _anybody_.

She had been reliant on a man once before. The fiasco had nearly shattered her entire being into tiny, undetectable fragments.

Thursday, the day before the spawn's return home, marked the absolute worst day of Jacob's descent into a liquid calamity.

He had dragged her to the crypt, practically broke down their front door, and then had collapsed on the floor inside the entryway and had demanded information. Pixie leech and soldier leech were much more careful than usual. Leah saw right through their soothing words, and immediately became suspicious. Something was off.

Jacob was too far gone into the spiral of goo to notice, and had lapped up all their feeble assurances without a moment's doubt. Had he not been drunk with the pain of separation, he would have caught on immediately. Jacob was usually sharp, and prone to occasional flashes of brilliance. He would have interrogated them for the truth.

As it was, Leah was obligated to be suspicious on her own. Jacob was too busy being sure that Nessie would rediscover her appreciation of him as soon as she returned home from her trip.

Friday came, and Leah played her MP3 on full blast while Jacob blabbered about anything and everything concerning the stupid spawn. She couldn't even hear him over the painful, blaring noise, and smiled in satisfaction.

The phone rang late in the afternoon. Jacob tripped over his own feet and slammed face first into the floor in his haste to seize it. Leah reached over and plucked it from its charger.

"Hello?" she rolled her eyes.

"Leah?" the voice on the other end sounded confused, "isn't this Jacob's phone?"

"No," she snapped.

"Oh – well I just want to let him know that Nessie is home, and we need to have a family meeting. You're both asked to come. There are some . . . things that need to be discussed."

Fucking great. Leah recognized the fortuneteller's leech immediately, and was disgruntled at the idea of going to the crypt with Bella and the spawn inside.

"What'd they say? What'd they say?" Jacob demanded. Leah hung up.

"Get your piece of shit – we have to go over there," Leah grumbled. Jacob dove for his motorcycle keys, and scrambled out of her bedroom door like a crazed ape.

"Nessie's back! And she wants to see me!" Jacob crowed. He did a happy dance while driving the motorcycle, causing it to shudder wildly. Leah hung on for dear life.

Jacob's face was alight with incomparable joy as they clambered off the motorcycle at the Cullen's house. Leah felt a pang of sadness, residue from her bitterness at losing her true love. Jacob had retained his, while she had lost hers.

Fuck Sam.

Leah was so distracted by her mental jealousy of Jacob and hatred towards Sam that it took her a fraction of a second to realize something. The spawn's heartbeat – light, quick, unbelievably irritating – was humming from inside. A fractionally slower, louder heartbeat echoed the pace from deeper within the house.

Puzzlement briefly flicked across Jake's face, but then happiness overwhelmed him again.

"C'mon," he ushered her up the steps, "go, go, go!"

Pixie leech, the prepubescent leech, and the Doc appeared at the top of the steps before they could go any further.

"Who's in there?" Leah asked warily, keeping one trembling hand on Jacob's sleeve.

"A visitor," Pixie fortuneteller leech grimaced, "there's two of them, actually."

"Huilen and her nephew, Nahuel," Prepubescent leech explained with a slightly superior, smug tone.

"We found them shortly after finding Kachiri, Zafrina, and Senna," the Doc added, "of course, this complicates matters with the treaty due to their diet. Would you please come in?"

Jake's smile had melted off his face the second Nahuel had been mentioned.

Leah knew who Nahuel was. He was spawn number 2, the male spawn, the stud spawn, the only masculine vampire human hybrid on the planet. He was youthful and resentful and angst-ridden, and an almost mirror image of Loch Ness's ever-so-charming personality.

He was also, consciously or not, the only befitting partner to Lochness in possibly the entire universe. No wonder Prepubescent leech looked smug. If everything worked out the spawn would get out of her varsity football player phase, marry Stud spawn, and leave Jacob-the-mutt in the dust.

"Lets go Leah," Jacob said darkly. He stomped into the house and headed straight for the dining room.

Leah followed, her every muscle coiled with anticipation. Along with stud spawn came Huilen, a parasite who hunted humans. Her absolute _worst _enemy.

They entered the dining room to an amusing sight. All nine Cullens – including Lochness herself- sat around the table like executives at an important meeting. Stud spawn and his auntie dearest waited, standing between the uppity prepubescent leech and the Doc.

Jacob's eyes went directly to the female monster progeny. Leah watched as she didn't even appear to notice – her eyes were zeroed in on the male spawn. Jacob winced.

"Nahuel, Huilen, do you remember the wolves from the Volturi incident?" Prepubescent leech asked, "Jacob here is an alpha, Leah is his beta."

They murmured hellos. Nahuel glanced covertly at Lochness, who blushed and looked down.

Now Jacob looked nauseous. She hoped he didn't throw up all over their shiny table. The jokes about her alpha's ineptitude and weak stomach would last decades.

"So, Jacob, we would just like to talk about Huilen and Nahuel's safety while they're here," the Doc said, "could you please be sure that no wolves harm them? They will hunt out of state, but it would be best if Sam's wolves were made aware that they are here."

Jacob was too busy glaring at Stud spawn, so Leah cut in, "I'll tell him."

"Thank you," the Doc smiled at her.

"Oh, and about the _other _matter," Whiny leech lowered her eyebrows significantly, "we should _probably _speak to the . . . _person_ about it."

Leah nearly lost her composure at Bella Cullen's amazing display of subtlety. Who the fuck did she think she was fooling? Everyone knew she was talking about Jacob, and his questionable relationship with the spawn.

"We should," Prepubescent leech agreed.

Lochness tore her gaze away from the Stud span, and trilled, "I will come as well."

Both of her parents nodded, "Yes, of course darling."

Jacob stood up, "Where should we do this?"

"We'll go to the cottage," Whiny leech decided, "Leah can wait here."

_Leah can wait here_. She wasn't a fucking dog that could be ordered around and expected to behave obediently! She would do whatever the hell she wanted!

"Leah should come," Jacob frowned, "she's been pulling this pack while I've been dealing with these . . . issues. She has every right to know the verdict."

She felt an unexpected wash of gratitude towards Jacob.

"Fine," Whiny leech scowled, and then whipped out of the dining room. Her two irritating family members followed directly behind.

Jacob glanced at her, "Its not too far – phase or not?"

She was trembling already, being surrounded by so many leeches, but shook her head, "No, lets just go. I don't want to deal with clothes."

They waded carefully across the river, and then raced towards the direction of the two leeches' personal little sex spot. It wasn't hard to find. It smelled worse than the house in terms of leech activity.

Leah beat him, of course, and then barged into the house without knocking. She was surprised at how unbelievably low the ceiling was. The house had obviously been built for the three vertically challenged, adolescent parasites. Jacob would have to stoop.

The three leeches had arranged themselves in their little living room, the two parents standing protectively behind the spawn's chair. The spawn herself narrowed her eyes as they walked in.

Jacob sat, so as not to have to stoop. Leah stood.

"How have you been?" Lochness asked, ignoring Leah.

Jacob shrugged, "Alright, I suppose."

The understatement of the decade, that one.

"Oh – good," she didn't look as if that was very good at all, "did you miss me?"

Leah understood the spawn's game immediately. Lochness didn't like Jacob, refused to date him, made his life a living hell, but would throw a fit if he didn't love her back. She wanted Jacob to pine and slobber over her for the rest of eternity, while she skipped about screwing anything that touched her fancy.

Jacob understood as well. His face contorted minutely, but then quickly rearranged itself, "A bit. Not too bad."

The spawn frowned, "Are you pleased to see Nahuel?"

"He's alright," Jake lied well, "but if he hunts anywhere near Washington, I'll rip him to pieces."

Whiny leech cleared her throat, "Jake – I want you to know that we didn't intend to hurt you by banning you."

Leah curled her lip. Jake played his part well, "I'm fine, honestly. It was a good week. Leah and I got a lot done."

No, they hadn't at all, but Leah was glad that Jacob was lying to save his dignity.

"I'm so sorry you're in pain," Whiny leech bit her lip and looked down at her folded hands, "so sorry. I wish I could make it better."

"I'm not in pain," Jacob laughed, "really. Now what do you want to talk about?"

Whiny leech sniffed, as if she was personally blaming herself for Jacob's invisible 'pain', and then looked at him resignedly, "Jacob, Renesmee would like to speak to you about the future."

The name _Renesmee _made Leah choke down a laugh, causing all three leeches to glare at her.

"Okay," Jake leaned forward, "shoot. What's up, Ness?"

The spawn straightened her back and glared at him coldly, "I would like you to know that I do not want to be near you for a while. I'm very interested in Nahuel, who is of my species, and I believe it is in our best interests to part ways. I care for you, but I require space."

_A well rehearsed speech_, Leah thought, watching as whiny leech and prepubescent leech grinned in satisfaction.

Jacob didn't let the pain show, "Okay. How long are we talking, here?"

"Until she's ready," Tween leech snarled, "you can't put a time limit on this. This is about Renesmee – think outside your own needs for once."

"Bloodsucker . . ." Leah growled warningly.

"Don't threaten my father, you wolf child," the spawn snapped, "this is none of your business."

"Child?" Leah raised her eyebrows in disbelief, "I'm older than you are, kid. And hell yes this is my business. I'm connected with Jake, remember? One pack? I'm in his head half the time!"

This pissed the spawn off. She spat venom out of her eyes, "I want you out of my house!"

"Is the meeting done?" Leah countered.

"Yes," she stood up, all of five feet tall, and glared directly at Jacob, "stay away from me for now. I'll be dating Nahuel shortly, and I can't have you in the way. We should both date within our own species."

Lochness pointed at the door, "Leave, please. We'll speak to you when Huilen leaves."

Jacob nodded, his mouth tight and his eyes unexplainably sad, and walked slowly out the door. Leah lingered for a moment.

"You're a selfish bitch, you know," Leah informed her. Then she stormed out of the house.


	7. Floating Facedown in a Sea of Sorrow

**Floating Facedown in a Sea of Sorrow**

Leah didn't phase to wolf form for a while after the spawn's rejection of Jacob. She stayed human, knowing he needed space and time to think. He needed a quiet mind, and she couldn't help him until he had accustomed himself to the idea of not being a part of the spawn's future.

Unfortunately being human for a week gave fate even more opportunities to gleefully fuck with her.

Sam visited her exactly a week after the parasite incident. The doorbell rang, Leah heard her mother's cold voice, and then footsteps sounded in the hall.

He didn't bother to knock, he just walked right in. Luckily she was fully clothed, and had been sprawled on her bed reading some article about a band in Seattle. He announced himself gravely, "Leah, I'm here to talk to you."

She shot him a dirty look, reached over, and put her headphones in her ears.

"Leah," he said warningly. She turned the volume up.

He struggled with himself, and from the corner of her eye she saw the exact same exasperation that had always been present in their relationship. She was too strong willed for his need for constant control. Emily was quieter, more submissive. Leah fought back, and Sam hated it.

Eventually his alpha aggression won over, and he strode over to rip the earphones out of her ears. She hissed.

"I need to _talk _to you," he insisted.

"Talk away," she snarled, "I'm _not_ listening."

He ignored her comment, and sat on the edge of her bed. She was struck by a sense of familiarity at the situation. How many times had he sat in the exact same place, with the exact same expression, while they loved each other?

"Listen, I know the baby name really hurt you," he hesitated, "and I'm sorry about that. Emily and I decided to name him something different."

Leah flipped the pages of the Seattle magazine. Against her will she listened to her stupid ex's stupid words.

"But you can't overreact like that every time something happens," he continued, "you shouldn't have ran off just because we wanted to honor your father. I know that you still . . . _care _for me, but please. It hurts Emily when you blow up like that whenever you hear anything about our relationship."

She gaped at him.

"Leah, I still love you. Just not _that way_. Can you please pull yourself together for Emily's sake?"

_For Emily's sake_?

"Its okay if you never get over me. I understand that. But you need to try to be happy, Leah, because your unhappiness is hurting those who care about you. Its cruel"

She was wordless from shock. She couldn't speak. Her brain was frozen with outrage and anger and pain.

He stood to leave, and lightly touched her shoulder; "Emily would like you to be in the delivery room when the baby is born. Think about it. We both would really like for you to be a part of our lives. We know you need love."

Her shoulder burned as if a vampire had bit her. Sam smiled sadistically, "Bye Lee-lee."

_Bye, Jackass_.

She phased and jumped out the window the second her door swung shut.

Jacob's pain, immeasurable and raw, hit her like a bulldozer the second her mind entered the link. She stumbled slightly in the forest outside her house, then pulled herself together and shielded herself with her own pain to block it. Jacob's pain surrounded her, searching for a weakness, but her own pain was so thick that his couldn't swallow her as well.

_Leah_, he choked. He felt guilty. He didn't mean for his own misery to attack her that way.

She couldn't respond. Her brain ran through Sam's words over and over again, her outrage and fury at his arrogance, her sorrow in his happiness, and her pain in knowing that he was absolutely right.

_Oh, Leah_, Jacob's tone turned even more anguished, _I'm so sorry_.

She pulled herself together enough to think, _Not your fault_. Then her mind succumbed to images of Sam and Emily. Remembering the day Sam broke her heart. Remembering their wedding. She collapsed inwards, torn into a downward spiral of misery caused by her first and only love.

Jacob was stricken. He recoiled from her ever-expanding pain, but at the same time reached out to try to help her. For a moment, at least, his own agony was forgotten.

"_I love you, just not that way_."

"_We'll always be together_."

"_You're everything to me, Leah, but . . . but Emily is undeniable. I don't have a choice. I'm so sorry._"

_"Its time to move on. Pull yourself together. I've healed, why can't you?"_

_"Leah, its over. Its done. I . . . we can't. I have Emily now, I don't have a choice. I can't fight it."_

She remembered herself, begging, crying, "Fight it! Fight it! I need you, Sam, I love you!"

Jacob flinched. Leah's memories cut him like a switchblade.

_Leah . . ._ Jacob waited.

She ran as hard and fast as she could. She wasn't sure exactly when it happened, but suddenly Jacob was supplying directions for her. She followed them numbly, not knowing or caring where her lighting-quick feet were carrying her. Sam ravaged her thoughts.

Her heart twisted, crumpled. Fault lines from the previous attacks showed brightly, and new slashes began forming. Jacob winced at the visual, but agreed whole-heartedly with it.

He provided an image of a small clearing, so far North it might have been Canada, and then continued guiding her.

_He visited you_? Jacob asked.

Leah ran through the entire conversation for Jacob's benefit. Jacob hissed with fury.

_I'm sorry. I should have been there._

But Leah remembered how badly it had hurt when Sam had first left her. She remembered the raw, agonizing pain, and knew that Jacob was incapable of functioning as a normal human being at the moment. She had been there. She knew what it was like.

_Yes, but, I'm your alpha_, he gave her an image of an uprooted tree pointed slightly eastwards, _its my responsibility to make sure you don't have to deal with that kind of pain._

She snorted. Her voice returned. _Have you seen my life? I have no happy ending, Jacob. These past five years have been the peak of it. Now you're a pit of despair, Sam and Emily are sadistically throwing everything they can in my face, and I can't escape._

He mused quietly over the words 'pit of despair.' Then his thoughts briefly flickered to his own pain, and he flinched.

Leah, in a fit of desperation and need to escape her familiar agony, dove directly into his memories.

During Jacob's week of separation he had thought frequently of the bleak future ahead, desolate with no meaning or joy. He had replayed the scene of his rejection over and over again, comparing it to Bella's frequent vicious dismissals. He had struggled with the overwhelming desire to _murder _Nahuel.

Leah savored each of these bits of pain that weren't her own, dissecting them carefully and giving each all of her attention. Her feet followed Jacob's directions; her mind ripped his heart to exposed shreds.

And, almost subconsciously, she compared each facet of his pain with the correlating fragment of her own. As she watched the spawn tell him she needed 'space', she felt Sam's own apologetic rejection fill her veins with hot lead. Hopeful images of Nahuel, burning sparked her own memories of wanting to drive a stake through Emily's heart.

She almost didn't realize that Jacob was searching her own mind in an attempt to escape _his _misery. Their anguish and reasoning was so eerily similar that they were able to snap the corresponding pieces together easily.

Leah darted through the forest so quickly that she knew she was going far, far faster than the fastest leech ever could. Jacob steered her easily.

As she ran, and Jacob writhed in pain in the clearing, they worked together to rearrange all their parallel memories and feelings into crisp pairs. Every cause of their combined inescapable pain – Bella, the spawn, Sam – all of it was filed into folders that matched. Bittersweet memories weren't touched. Leah's happy moments with Sam, Jacob's bliss with the toddler spawn, all of that was left alone.

It could have been hours, or minutes later. Leah did not keep track of time. Exhaustion, both emotional and physical, seeped through her consciousness. Jacob yanked her towards the small Northern clearing, now darkened with the shadow twilight.

When she arrived, limping with pain, Jacob stood. _Leah_.

She collapsed in the clearing, her legs unable to support her. Her mind torn with images of Sam, her heart mangled, her body exhausted. She felt cold.

He was equally exhausted, his entire being wracked with pain so intense and familiar that she shied away. He curled up next to her, warming her with his overheated body.

_He's an asshole_, Jacob muttered mentally, _how can he keep doing this to you?_

_The spawn isn't any better_, Leah noted tiredly, _she's playing with you, Jacob. You saw her game. She wants your undying affection, but she'll never return it._

He was silent for a few minutes. She felt his sad recognition of the fact, and then he sighed internally, _I can't be near her. She isn't healthy. I'll always want her company, and want her safety more than anything else, but I can't keep living like this._

_Then don't_, Leah suggested, _she'll be fine. She's invincible, she's got a huge family, and now she's got the only other male of her species. Leave her be. She's your imprint – do what's best for her._

_I'm not sure how I'll survive_, he admitted, _I can't . . . just this week I've wanted to die. Death has to be easier than this._

_I hope so_, Leah rested her gray head on her paws, _because this is about as hellish as life can possibly get_.

He agreed. He leaned his great russet body against her slightly, and suppressed his terror of the future.

_I have the rest of eternity to live and worry and die over her actions, _Jake thought bleakly, _there is nothing but time. She'll continue hurting me, and I'll continue doing anything she asks at my own expense. I have no choice. And all I want is to fight back and break these awful bonds._

_Break them_, Leah told him.

_How_? He asked despairingly, _you're in my mind. You know that she ties the universe down for me – I can't break those bonds!_

Leah knew. Leah knew exactly what it was like to feel as if one person held your world in the palm of their hand, and what it would be like if that person tossed it away as if it were nothing. She knew the terror of the experience.

_Life goes on, Jake_, Leah imagined Sam and Emily, together, and her own world steadily piecing itself back into some semblance of normal, _it takes time, but you have forever._

_Forever sucks_, Jacob thought petulantly.

_Yes, it does,_ Leah shivered at the idea of Sam and Emily, together, their offspring haunting her as she prowled the earth for centuries.

_You need to find somebody to love you, Leah_, Jacob thought, his tone contemplative, _you need to find somebody who can make you forget that disaster of a relationship._

_Same applies to you, pal_.

He cringed, _Its too soon._

_It's been years for me, Jake, and its still a bitch, _Leah sighed; _you learn to numb yourself to it. You learn to deal, and to distract yourself. But when you're by yourself at night, you remember, and it hurts just as bad as the day it happened._

Jacob stretched slightly, staring up as the stars began popping from behind the veil of clouds, _I'll never phase again. I'll age and die._

_With a coven down the road? To hell you won't_, Leah thought bitterly, _I've tried. I still phase._

Practice makes perfect.

_Not in this case_.

His massive shoulders sank. After a while, both of them floating facedown in their individual seas of sorrow, he asked her, _Can we go human? I can't deal with . . . all of it right now._

_I don't have clothes._

_I have shorts, sweats, and a t-shirt, _he imagined it in his head, _that's enough._

_Fine_.

He raised himself up, and Leah immediately felt colder. He disappeared behind a small cluster of trees, and then reappeared as his usual human self, his eyes wild and a loose pair of basketball shorts tied around his waist.

Leah rose and moved behind the trees, noticing a small pile of fabric placed in a pile on the ground. She nosed it, noticed Jacob's musky scent, and rolled her eyes. She would smell like a man.

Still, she phased back, slipped the enormously oversized clothes over her cold body, and moved back to where Jacob was leaning against a large tree.

"Its freezing," she snapped.

"Come sit next to me then," he patted the ground next to him, "I'm hot."

"No, you're not," she quipped. But she sat, and pressed her arm against the length of his.

They sat, companionably, both silently drowning in individual misery. Still, Leah was grateful for Jacob's presence. He understood her anguish. He shared it, almost. And with his huge, overheated body next to hers, she felt less alone then before.

She closed her eyes and let her heart be blown to smithereens.


	8. Sam and Emily's Impeccable Naming Skills

**Sam and Emily's Impeccable Naming Skills**

Sometime during the night Leah had grown too cold, and had slipped out of the borrowed clothes and phased back to being a wolf. She had stepped carefully away from Jacob, and then had curled herself tightly against the tree. It was a rock in a sea of misery – her own, and Jacob's.

She tampered down her own unhappiness after only a few days of quiet anguish. It was routine for her now. Sam or Emily would do something exceedingly cruel or stupid, she'd die for a few days, and then suck it up and staple her heart shut. After so many years of following this schedule, it was nothing but automatic now.

It was different for Jacob. His wounds were fresh, bleeding. Bella's marks had long faded on his heart, but the spawn had slashed open plenty more. Leah stayed with him, knowing that now he needed someone to make him feel less alone.

She watched, tail swishing, as he went through cycles of grief. She witnessed a few tears, a few angry outbursts, and hours of quiet, despairing contemplation. It was like watching a male version of herself years previously. After Sam's departure, she couldn't even call herself human.

"What am I going to _do_?" he kept repeating, his eyes bleak and hopeless, "where am I going to go from this?"

Leah had no answer. She sat beside him quietly, hoping he'd derive comfort from her loyalty.

Once, when they were in wolf form, he had absentmindedly thought, _Is it even worth it?_

Again, she could not answer. He instantly repelled the question.

Jacob was ready to go home after a month of living in the wild. Leah had suffered through his agony, had concealed her own, and was shocked at how quickly he had glued himself together. It had taken her at least a year to get to where he was at – grim, hateful acceptance and a want to move on.

"I think you helped," he told her honestly, "I've seen all this before, with you, and I knew how to deal with it. Besides, you were patient, and you listened. You understood."

Perhaps that was so. Leah didn't know – if she had helped, then great. If she hadn't, then Jacob was just a real life Superman.

They returned to La Push just in time for Emily to go into labor. Leah stepped out of the shower to the phone ringing. Sam had called Leah, and asked her if she'd like to be in the delivery room. She had snapped off some tart, bitchy response, and then handed the phone to Jacob. Sam got an earful.

They had made a pact while they were in Canada. Jacob would have Leah's back concerning her sadistic ex, and she would have his concerning his pathetic spawn imprint. It worked out well. When Sam called again, approximately eight hours later, he made sure not to talk to Leah.

"It's a girl?" Sue gasped.

Leah and Jacob listened as Sam shouted joyfully from the other end of the phone. Leah put on her brave face, and strained to hear his words.

"What's her name?" Sue asked.

Sam said something, and Sue's smile faded.

"Are you sure, Sam?" she demanded, "that doesn't seem very fair."

Sam argued something, and Sue interrupted, "Fine, fine. Yes, I'll tell them. When can I go see Emily? Is she doing okay?"

Leah bit her lip as Sam said something else. Then Sue nodded, "We'll be over in a few minutes. See you soon."

She hung up, placing the phone into its cradle on the wall.

"Well?" Jacob said expectantly.

"Sam wants the three of us to go over right away," she grimaced, "Emily's asking for us, Leah, and Sam wants to talk to you, Jacob."

"They had a girl?" Leah breathed.

Sue grabbed her car keys, not looking at her daughter, "Yes. Are you coming?"

"No," Jacob spoke for both of them, "Sue, you know that would be too hard. I'll call Sam after you leave."

Sue hesitated, and then nodded, "I'll be home in time to make dinner. Make sure Seth and Amanda get home from Seattle in time, okay?"

They nodded. Jacob grabbed the phone, and dialed Sam's number.

Leah drifted towards the counter, imagining the picture she had dreamed up plenty of times as a high school student. Sam, holding a baby, his face lit up with joy. Of course it wasn't _her _baby. It was her fucking cousin's baby, but still . . .

"Great, Sam," Jacob snapped suddenly, starting Leah, "Real brilliant . . . No, I don't even want to hear it. You're an ass. When you've decided to quit ruining Leah's life, give me a call."

He hung up the phone viciously.

"What?" Leah demanded, "what's the big deal? How is he ruining my life this time?"

Jacob didn't coddle her, and Leah was thankful for that. He just looked at her straight on, "Leah. They named their baby girl Leah."

Well, _fuck _Sam and Emily.

"At least they have good taste in names," Leah mumbled. Then she retrieved her MP3 player, blasted it at maximum volume, and tried to keep herself from getting the documents necessary to change her own fucking name.

Jacob managed to shield Leah from most of the Sam/Emily baby drama, and she was strangely appreciative of it. Usually she repelled any form of assistance or care, but in this case she embraced it. Jacob knew how to care for her without making her feel like an incompetent lazy bitch. She accepted his help, and filed away a reminder for some future, spontaneous act of kindness.

"Thanks," she told him a week after the stupid cub had been born, "I mean, don't take this too far, but you're really helping me out by doing this."

"No problem," he had smiled. His eyes were still sad.

Leah and Jacob had been close before Jacob's rejection, but suddenly they were inseparable. They needed each other. Leah craved Jacob's presence like a drug, welcoming his pain and suffering. She found a kindred spirit in Jake's devastated, lacerated heart and depressed mentality. She understood him.

Jacob needed her too. He clung to her experience in matters of happy things, like the shattering of hearts and the pain of loneliness. She let him hang around. For once, it was nice to share the misery.

A month following their return from Canada the little fortuneteller leech called. Leah, feeling disgusting for recognizing the fucking phone number, answered. _Alice_, as Jacob firmly called her, warned them that the demonic spawn would be contacting Jacob soon, but she was sure with her decision to stay with Nahuel. Leah inferred that it would be nothing more than a lets-screw-with-Jacob-and-mangle-him-more visit, and told him straight up that it was going to happen.

The week following the call Jacob was moodier than ever. He refused to speak to anyone, and glared like an angry ape at the wall. Leah, instead of her usual tough love approach, drifted around helplessly. She felt obligated to help him but had no idea how to do so.

She found her opportunity when the phone rang, yet again, at exactly nine o'clock on Saturday morning. Jacob answered.

"Wait, what?" he asked tiredly.

Leah sat on her bed and watched him anxiously. His expression slowly changed from tired and sad to alert and pissed.

"What do you _mean_?"

He ripped a few threads out of Leah's rug, his face furious. "She expects me to do that? I can't. I won't . . . No, _you _don't understand . . . no, I didn't agree! . . . wait, no, I - "

The line went dead. Jacob, visibly shaking he was so angry, forced himself to set it down gently.

"And?" Leah looked at him expectantly.

"Nessie wants me to meet her and her family at the house. They're moving to South America for a year and want me to come with them. And Nahuel. Nessie wants me as a _pet brother_. Permanently."

Leah's heart leapt into a rage so swiftly it surprised her. She ground out words so slowly and clearly it frightened her, "They want you to move away from your home, your family, and your pack so you can hang around on a tiny island listening to the stupid spawn fucking her mate? For forever? They expect you to follow her around like a petfor the rest of eternity, always miserable because you're a slave?"

He nodded.

"No!" she snarled.

"I don't want to," he glanced down at his hands, "but I can't say no. She's my imprint. She owns me."

"That's sick," Leah snapped, "she doesn't _own _you. She's an arrogant six year old that believes the world kneels at her feet. You don't owe her anything."

"I can't _help _it," he pleaded, "it isn't what I want, but it doesn't matter! I can't say no to her!"

"No, you can't," Leah jumped to her feet, "but I can."

Jacob looked stricken, "What are you doing?"

Leah rolled her eyes, "What do you think I'm doing, dumbass? I'm going to go tell the stupid monster that you're not going. That you're done with her shit."

Jacob's face melted, as if he was being wrenched apart by scalding iron prongs and had no idea how to fix the situation. He looked lost and confused and angry, and willing to slit his own throat if it meant making the agony go away. "You . . . but, no."

"But, yes," she mimicked him, "if you move from this spot I'll wrench out your intestines and make you eat them. I'm done with this, and you're clearly done with this. Its time it was finished."

"I . . ." he trailed off hopelessly.

"Stay here," she repeated. Then she jumped out the window.


	9. Showtime

**Showtime**

Leah stole Jacob's motorcycle for the occasion. She nabbed his keys off the counter at his house, and dragged the heap of garbage out of the shed. She even went as far as filching one of Rachel's pairs of jeans, folded neatly in a pile of at-home-laundry, to replace her ratty pajama pants. Rachel was as tall as she was, and rarely cared if her clothes were damaged. Or ripped to shreds in a werewolf fit of rage. In the pocket was a pack of gum, miraculously undamaged by the washing machine. Leah helped herself to some watermelon bubblegum.

Forks was quiet as she sped down the damp, dark pavement. Saturday mornings were lazy mornings in the little town. Clouds overhead threatened rain, but did not deliver. She was thankful for it. Her short hair, tied into a little ponytail, was flat enough without added dampness.

She turned down the hidden drive and suppressed the urge to stuff twigs up her nose to block out the stench. The filthy parasites could be smelled from the highway. It wasn't enough that the leeches had to stink up half the forest, but apparently they claimed public transportation routes as well now. Great.

The big creepy house, all done up with flowers, made her want to drive her motorcycle straight into the river. Restraining herself, she parked the motorcycle and pocketed the rusty keys.

Leah did everything she could to sound like Jacob as she made her way up the stairs. She panted heavily, stomped loudly, and bounded up the steps. Unfortunately Prepubescent leech would already know her identity, but she hoped he'd be surprised enough to keep his mouth firmly shut.

She pounded on the door. Flecks of white paint sprinkled off, dusting the cuffs of Rachel's jeans with white powder.

The leeches inside were silent, and it unnerved her when the door abruptly swung open. "Leah." Whiny leech smiled at her.

"Bella," Leah pulled a grin on her face, "is your spawn home?"

The parasite's face twisted, as if Leah's words had forced themselves down some unfathomably deep and dark well of sorrow and grief. It was as if Leah had inadvertently tripped upon some traumatic childhood memory, wrenching Bella into abrupt depression and pain. Her eyes were far away, her mouth tight, her expression heartbroken.

Leah watched her, amused.

"I will ask you to speak of my daughter in polite terms," Whiny leech whispered tragically. Then she turned and fled towards where Leah knew the dining room was.

Not waiting to be invited in, Leah stomped through and slammed the door shut behind her. Let the leeches know she was here. She was here and she was _pissed_. Bella just served to fuel her ever-present fire.

The dining room was the most logical choice for Leah to go. It seemed like anytime there was due to be a showdown or decision of sorts, it was in the dining room. Leah figured the leeches felt bad for the neglected space and wanted to use the room for _something_. It was difficult to wrestle a grizzly for dinner without damaging the polished antique table.

As expected, the leeches were all sitting around the table. Whiny leech had perched on her prepubescent husband's lap, her arms strangling him and her head buried in his neck. Their freakish progeny sat beside them, one of her hands stiffly entwined with Nahuel's and the other firmly in her lap.

Only three of the leeches – both of the blondes and the brawny one – looked at all comfortable with the situation. Both blondes looked too haughty and annoyed to even care about what was going on, while WWE leech just grinned like an idiot. Leah briefly wondered if he found some sort of sick amusement in interspecies soul mate dramatics.

"Leah Clearwater," the Doc smiled tightly at her, "are you here to speak for Jacob?"

Leah nodded. In a sense. _Speaking _was a bit too kind of phrasing for what she was planning on doing.

"Why didn't he come himself?" the spawn demanded.

Leah shrugged, "I think he ate some bad shrimp. Or something. He just wants to veg out and watch mindless reality TV for a day or so until he feels better."

The little gruesome family of three all looked deeply offended at her words. The spawn especially appeared furious, her face slightly twitching as she inferred that Jacob was more concerned with his digestion issues than with her 'news.'

"Go get him, please," the spawn ordered, "I wish to deliver this information to him in person. He will be delighted."

"Sorry, but I can't do that," Leah leaned against the wall casually, "got my orders, now I'm here. Jacob is _unavailable_ at the moment, may I take a message?"

"This isn't funny," Prepubescent leech snarled, "my daughter requires a word with her imprint. Will you truly deny her this?"

Leah raised her eyebrows at him in an are-you-utterly-insane expression, "Uh, yeah."

The doc looked pained, "I would say we could delay this, but it is rather urgent that this meeting take place quickly. We have many arrangements to make in a very short amount of time. Can we please just use Leah as our envoy? She is trustworthy."

"Yeah, seriously," the blonde supermodel one rolled her eyes, "me and Alice have yet to shop for South America appropriate apparel for all of you. We are so behind. Just talk to Leah."

Leah winked at the little family of horrors. All three of them scowled back at her, identical, irritated expressions mucking up their creepily attractive faces.

"So, _Leah_," the spawn twisted the word in her mouth with delicate fury, "I presume Jacob is aware of the matter of which I wish to speak?"

It took Leah a moment to respond. Lochness's hand, entwined with Nahual's, had twitched with something like frustration. Leah grinned inwardly at her success. This would be too easy.

"Yep," Leah crossed her arms, "got filled in this morning, couldn't bring himself to care over his stomach problems, and sent me skipping over to do his bidding."

Whiny leech glared wrathfully at her, "Could you please make an _attempt _at kindness and gentleness towards my daughter?"

"Nope," Leah grinned.

The spawn glared at Bella, "I can handle this on my _own_, mother."

"Nessie," prepubescent leech trailed off warningly.

The spawn huffed. "Would you all just let me deal with this? This is my imprint, my life, and _my _issue with this female wolf. Please bother yourselves with your _own _business."

Considering the various nicknames for the spawn which were running on a constant loop in Leah's head, 'female wolf' seemed positively warm.

"Darling, you are only six years old," Bella patted her daughter condescendingly on the head, "please try to understand that we are only looking out for your best interests."

"You don't need to," the spawn sniffed, "please be quiet and remove yourselves from this discussion."

Leah briefly noted that the spawn, at merely sixteen years old maturity-wise, already sounded more uppity and self-important than Edward Cullen. A monumental achievement, truthfully.

"As much as I simply _adore _listening to your little family spats," Leah drawled, "I do have places to be. Can we make this quick? Tell me what you want Jacob to do, and I'll give you his response."

Or rather, she'd improvise her previously planned speech depending on how arrogant the spawn sounded while dolling out orders.

The spawn flicked her reddish curls out of her face, and set her mouth into a neat little frown. Leah snapped her gum.

"Fine," the spawn took her hand away from Nahuel's and folded it in her lap, "please tell Jacob that I require his presence as my family moves to South America - "

Leah inwardly snorted.

"Please inform him that I want him in my life, as a pet brother, and that I expect him to stay with me for as long as I shall have it - "

Leah inwardly gagged.

"I hold much affection for him, and wish him nothing but happiness - "

_Liar_, Leah mentally growled.

" – and I am very much looking forward to continuing our lives together as siblings. I expect an immediate, positive reply, and he needs his bags packed by tomorrow. We leave immediately."

Leah's hands, of their own accord, curled into fists. The spawn sat primly in her seat, "That is all."

"Oh – and please tell him I can't wait to have him as an adoptive son," Bella looked down demurely, as if blushing, "I miss him. He's my best friend."

Jacob no longer considered Bella as anything more than an acquaintance now. How ironic that suddenly, as soon as Nessie gave him up, Bella decided they had a deep emotional bond again.

Prepubescent leech nodded in agreement, "I as well. Jacob is like a son to me."

Leah personally thought it strange that the tween leech even considered himself a father figure to his own daughter, let alone a full grown man.

"Jacob is very much welcome as an integral part of this family," the sweet mother leech offered quietly, "even though we are not all traveling to South America, we would still appreciate him from across the distance."

"Of course we would," the Doc smiled, "so Leah. What is Jacob's response?"

And here it was.

The opportunity to _finally_, with no inhibitions, with no restraints or consequences, with no guidelines or rules . . . here was her opportunity to verbally slash the stupid parasites to pieces.

She was going to annihilate them with insults. Pound them with club-like heaps of guilt. Force them to realize exactly how pathetic and stupidly conceited they were.

The spawn cocked her head expectantly. Leah's eyes zeroed in on her, and her mouth curved upwards in anticipant, destructive glee.

Showtime.

"No."

The leeches did not move, but Leah could sense a slight confusion wafting among them. The spawn giggled slightly and tilted her head, "Come again?"

"I said no," Leah stood tall, not leaning on the wall anymore, "Jacob refuses to move all the way to fucking South America to be with ridiculously pathetic people that only try to hurt and abuse him."

Smiles faded. A few of the leeches looked mildly offended, while the gruesome threesome simply appeared as if they'd misheard her.

"Can you clarify this? Is it truly _Jacob's _wish not to leave?" Prepubescent leech smiled contemptuously, "I believe he is unaware of this, and that you are speaking for an uninformed man."

"No, I'm speaking for Jake," Leah grinned, flashing her sharp teeth, "he answered the phone this morning, didn't he? Felt too sick, sent me instead. Even lent me his motorcycle. He genuinely hates you all and doesn't want to drag his sorry ass down to South America in order to waste away his life."

Bella's lip twitched. Prepubescent leech quickly wrapped his arms around her, and stared hard at Leah.

"You are lying, Leah Clearwater," the spawn said shrilly, "there is no way Jacob would say no. He is my imprint. He denies me nothing."

"He denies you this," Leah mimicked back snottily.

The doc cleared his throat, "Are you sure?"

"Oh I'm sure," Leah glared directly at the spawn, "_you _have done nothing but twist and manipulate that poor boy until he didn't even know which fucking way was up. Do you honestly believe that I am stupid enough to allow him to fall prey to you _again_? Jacob is not going anywhere you and your little games. He doesn't care about you anymore."

The spawn's face twisted in Bella-esque dramatic pain. All the leeches looked at Leah, shocked.

"Some of you have been nice to Jake," Leah continued quickly, hating how guilty she felt when she looked at the sweet mother leech, "but you, Lochness, have been nothing but trouble and he's done."

The spawn, recovering from her shock, drew herself up furiously, "Leah Clearwater, you must stop! You are spouting off lies and cruelty, and I demand you leave at once! I will speak to Jake within the next few hours. You will not interfere."

"You're not seeing him," Leah's voice slid into a low growl.

"Yes I am," Lochness spat acid out of her eyes, "Jacob will be my brother for all of eternity, my family will move to South America, and you cannot do anything about it."

Leah felt herself growing angrier and angrier, "No! You stupid girl, don't you get it? Jacob. Is. Done. He doesn't _want _you or your life or your family – any of it! He's sick of your shit and he has finally rejected even the notion of a future with you. He's moved on. You are _never _allowed near him."

"You can't stop her," Prepubescent leech snapped, "she's his imprint. He loves her. You can't stand in the way of this."

"This isn't about me!" Leah clenched her fists, "Jacob Black is no longer interested in seeing you three! Ever again! He's done, he's over it, and you've caused him enough pain."

Spawn bared her teeth, "I despise you."

"Likewise," Leah tossed at her, and then went back to glaring at the entwined Prepubescent leech and Whiny leech.

"Why are you so cruel?" Whiny leech implored her despairingly, "why? What have we ever done to you?"

"You've hurt Jake," Leah replied furiously, "_you _mangled him so badly he almost killed himself, and _you_, Spawn, have been nearly as bad! He's my pack. My friend. I'm obligated to protect him, and now I'm finally able to protect him from your endless parade of shit."

"I've done nothing wrong," the Spawn insisted, "I love Jacob. I've invited him to stay with me for all of eternity. What more could he want?"

"Uh – a life?" Leah suggested sarcastically, "it kills him watching you prance around with your little mutant boyfriend. You're demanding that he spend the rest of his life away from his home, away from his pack, sitting on a beach somewhere watching you frolic with your sexmate. You really think he wants to do that?"

For the very first time, a couple of the leeches looked uneasy.

"Jacob hates you. He hates that you demand his love for nothing in return. He hates that you're a cruel bitch that never sets him free. And now, finally, he's setting his foot down. You are no longer invited to be a part of his life."

The spawn opened her mouth, but Leah cut her off, "I'm not finished!"

She shrank back. Leah continued harshly, "If you ever, and I mean _ever_, set foot on our land, you are now an open target. None of the packs recognize you as anything but a hostile enemy. Do not contact Jacob. I will personally rip you, your Mommy, and your tween Daddy to microscopic pieces if you even _attempt _to dial his phone number or mail him anything. Understood?"

Bella sobbed dryly.

"I'm leaving now," Leah shot her one last glare, "enjoy the rest of your life rotting away in fucking South America."

The front door slammed violently shut behind her, satisfactorily cutting off the sound of Bella's pathetic sobbing.

Leah drove off with a smirk under her motorcycle helmet.


	10. Nauseatingly Cute Gurgling Noises

**Nauseatingly Cute Gurgling Noises**

Jacob was sitting on her floor, wringing his hands in misery when she returned to her house. He leapt up and widened his eyes in anticipation, his foot tapping so quickly she almost couldn't see it. "Well?" he demanded.

"It's over," Leah announced nonchalantly.

"What do you mean, it's over?"

She raised an eyebrow incredulously, "_It's over. _She won't talk to you ever again. I forbid her from visiting, calling, or writing to you. They all understand that you are completely and utterly done."

Jacob let out a deep, shaky breath. His face seemed composed entirely of shock, and hope.

"What the hell did you _say_?"

So Leah sat down, pulled Jacob with her, and told him the entire story. She told him how Bella was acting interested in him again, how the motherly leech had been heartbroken, and how the Doc seemed genuinely sorry for his situation. She told him how the prepubescent leech – _Edward_ – had been completely affronted and had nearly ripped her face off.

But above all else, she told him how utterly arrogant the spawn had been. The lochness monster had treated Leah like a child, and had been so completely confident in Jacob's lack of a backbone that she hadn't believed Leah until well after twenty minutes of debating had passed. Jacob's eyes had saddened at this point – he knew Nessie was flawed, probably as a result of her horrendous parenting.

"And Nahuel didn't talk once," Leah finished proudly, "I think he was so terrified of everyone, and you, that he couldn't even speak."

"He was probably afraid of _you_," Jacob said in awe, "I mean, you told all of them to fuck themselves eighteen different ways."

Leah grinned, "Damn right, I did."

He simply stared at her, his dark eyes brimming with gratitude. Leah felt a wash of pride engulf her. For quite possibly the first time in her life, she had done a good deed. She had freed Jacob from the chains of pain that would have encircled him if he had encountered the spawn alone. Because of her, he was free.

Maybe she wasn't such a heartless bitch after all.

"Leah, _thank you_," he finally said fervently.

"You're welcome," she flashed him a rare smile.

He stood up, towering over her, and offered her a hand, "C'mon, lets go, your Mom was looking for you earlier."

She accepted his hand, and he jerked her up from the ground with no effort at all. In fact, he was so strong that her toes left the ground for a second, and she fell into his chest.

Perhaps it was his intention, because he immediately wrapped his arms around her in a hug of gratitude. She stiffened in surprise – Leah Clearwater was not _huggable_ – but eventually reciprocated it. His body heat seared her through and through. She could feel his sculpted body, his strong arms, his utterly heartbreaking innocence. Jacob was more fragile than he was letting on, but he was still a thousand times stronger than she had been with Sam.

After a few seconds, he released her and gave her a boyish grin. "Lets go."

Leah trailed after him, and eventually found Sue in the kitchen.

"Oh, hey kids," Sue smiled tiredly, "Leah, Emily called me today. Little Leah is over a month old and you've yet to see her. Emily's beginning to get upset."

Leah fidgeted uncomfortably.

"I get that you're mad at Sam," Sue tilted her head, "but Emily is still your cousin, Leah. And you need to love her right now. Being a new mother is hard."

_Like I would know_. _Or like I will ever know_, Leah thought acidly.

Her bitterness surprised her, but also gave her ammunition in this argument with her mother. She realized she had more to be resentful about than just her broken heart.

"It's not just Sam, Mom," Leah looked at her with hard eyes, "have you ever thought babies are kind of difficult for me to be around, too? Largely because I will _never have one_?"

Sue and Jacob both winced in unison. It was her mother's greatest pain that her daughter would never experience children of her own. Leah knew this, and took advantage of it.

"I don't want to be reminded of everything I can't have in life, in one sitting," Leah crossed her arms, "tell Emily I'm sorry, but I won't do that."

"I think you need to tell Emily," Sue said gently, "I think you need to go over there, just once, and explain to her why you're behaving this way. She'll understand – but she needs to hear it from you."

Unfortunately, her mother wasn't giving up.

Leah frowned, "I don't want to visit there once, or ever."

"Leah," Sue held her gaze, exhibiting the strength of will Leah often displayed, "you need to. Just once."

"Can't I just call?" Leah pleaded.

Sue set her jaw, "No. Emily is your closest cousin, and used to be one of your dearest friends. You need to go over there, explain to _her _why you need distance, and handle it like an adult. I don't care how you behave around Sam, but you can't continue this stubbornness with Emily."

Leah felt herself fill up with rage. Unfortunately, she didn't know who to direct her anger at. Her mother was absolutely right. And Leah hated it.

"I'll go with you," Jacob volunteered, "I need to talk to Sam about the vampires anyway. There's going to be some adjustments with our restrictions."

Sue looked at him with surprise, "A fight?"

"No, just a change," Jacob glanced at Leah, "I'm not going to be over there as much anymore."

Even with all her anger, Leah was able to feel a streak of pride for Jacob. He really was going to be okay with all of this.

Sue nodded, "Alright, I'll call Emily and tell her you two are coming over. Do you need to borrow my car?"

Suddenly, Leah felt the weight of what was about to happen crash upon her. She really was going to have to go over to Sam and Emily's cute little cottage, meet their cute little cub, and tell her beautiful cousin she wasn't going to be around anymore.

"Sure," Jacob said, realizing Leah was mute, "got the keys?"

The drive to Sam and Emily's house was relatively short, but it seemed to drag on forever for Leah. She sat in the passenger seat, her brow furrowed, watching the green forest sweep by in a blur of soggy leaves.

Really, she found it ironic that the day Jacob had his showdown with the spawn, she would have hers with the cute werewolf family of three. She didn't _want _to do it, but she figured Jacob hadn't really wanted his to happen either.

"The end result will be good," Jacob promised her randomly as they pulled into the driveway.

"Speaking from experience?" she asked sarcastically.

"Recent experience," he switched off the ignition and jerked the keys out of the car, "ready?"

She shrugged and glared at the adorable cottage in front of her, "What the hell."

"Hey, if he starts being a prick, I'll step in," Jacob smiled, "I owe you."

Leah wanted nothing more than to assure him she wouldn't require his help. Unfortunately, she couldn't really do that. Sam usually made her too angry or sad to think straight. Having Jacob there, calm and ready to assist her, would be enormously helpful.

She sucked in a deep breath, and adopted an angry scowl, "Let's do this."

"Let's," he agreed.

She clambered out of the car and slammed the door shut, perhaps a bit too violently. Jacob gave her a sideways glance, and then knocked on the cute little red door. Leah glared hatefully at the flowerpots spilling over with color and the _Welcome, Friends! _doormat. Could the house be any less nauseating?

Sam opened the door.

"Hello Jacob, Leah," he hesitated, "Sue called."

"We know, we were there," Leah told him.

"Right," he opened the door awkwardly, "come in."

They both ducked through the undersized doorway, and entered the quaint cottage. Leah wrinkled her nose distastefully at the familiar furniture and smell. She had spent a lot of time in this cottage, and thought of it as almost a second home. Now the entire place exuded Sam and Emily, and made her want to retch.

The little living room, with its pale blue sofa and lacy white curtains, was utterly dominated by an enormous crib. Emily stood bent over it, her shiny dark hair hiding her face. Cute gurgling noises emanated from the mass of pink blankets.

"Emily," Sam looked at her with gooey eyes, "Jacob and Leah are here."

Emily stood gracefully, sweeping her hair back, and beamed brightly at the pair of them. "Leah, I'm so glad you're here!"

Leah felt her face crack as she attempted to smile back.

Emily hurried over and gave Leah a hug. Leah bent slightly to return it, feeling unbelievably awkward. That was two hugs in one day. A new record.

Her cousin stepped back and took her in, her sparkling brown eyes overflowing with happiness. Leah felt self-conscious. Emily was beautiful, albeit her scars, with her small, round, womanly body. Leah was tall and thin and boyish, with hard muscles and calloused skin. They were opposites in every way.

Sam stepped forward, as if wary of Leah being near Emily, and wrapped his arm around his wife's waist. Leah suffered silently.

"So, this is the kid?" Jacob strode forward and peered into the crib.

"Yes," Emily moved away from Sam to stare mistily into the bundle of blankets, "that's our little Leah Claire."

"Claire?" Jacob looked confused.

"After my niece," Emily clarified, "Quill's imprint."

Jacob grinned, "Oh, right. How is the little monster? I haven't seen her in a while."

"She's doing well," Emily smiled softly, "such a warm soul. Quill takes very good care of her."

Leah felt nauseous, with the familial, comfortable atmosphere and all this talk of imprints and eternal love. So, almost rudely, she decided to interrupt, "Hey, Jake, didn't you need to talk to Sam about something?"

Jacob got the message, "Yep. You want to go out back or something?"

Sam seemed reluctant to leave his wife and baby with Leah, as if she was some sort of horrible, cannibalistic beast. Leah rolled her eyes, "I'll behave myself."

Emily nodded, "Go with Jacob, Sam."

Sam made eye contact with Leah, his face pinched with some sort of emotion Leah couldn't place. With sadness, she realized she could no longer read Sam like a book. He was different. Changed. And as if she was tuned to a different radio station, she could no longer intercept the silent message he was trying to communicate to her.

They disappeared out the back door, and Leah was left alone with her cousin and little Leah Claire.

"You can sit down," Emily smiled, and reached into the crib to lift her little bundle of joy.

Leah sat.

"So, Sue said you had to tell me something important. What's going on?" Emily sat beside her, arranging the blankets more tightly around the baby.

Leah stayed silent for the moment, watching as a tiny, perfect face emerged from the blankets. Leah Claire had tufts of dark hair, with a perfect rosebud mouth and intelligent, innocent brown eyes. She looked like Emily, before her accident.

"She's beautiful," Leah finally said, her heart filling with pain at the flawlessness of the miniature child before her.

"She is," Emily agreed, "she has Sam's eyes."

"And your everything else," Leah swallowed painfully, "has it been hard?"

"What, motherhood?" Emily laughed softly, "not at all. I'm meant for it. And she's the easiest baby – never cries at all. I imagined it would be so much harder."

Of course Emily would be a natural mother, and of course the baby would be utterly divine. Sam and Emily led a perfect, fairy-tale life free of danger or disruption. This baby, really, couldn't have been anything other than quiet and lovely.

Leah felt her heart shrivel with acerbic anger.

"The best part is, Sam secretly wanted a girl," Emily's eyes danced, "I mean, I thought every man wanted a son, but he pined for a little girl of his own. He's so happy now."

Even though Emily didn't mean to, she unintentionally shot flaming arrows into Leah's heart. Sure, Sam was so happy _now_. What was he when he was with Leah, before Emily, before his transformation? Was that happiness?

Emily seemed to sense Leah's distress, because she laid a hand on her knee. "We both miss you a lot, Leah."

"Yeah, I know," she sighed.

"No, really," Emily's face seemed to darken slightly with grief, "you were an enormous part of both our lives, and now you're . . . exiled. And I think it's largely our fault, but we both share the blame. I'm so glad we can begin to resolve it."

Leah looked at her cousin, her face scarred, her soul exuding contentment, and she found herself conflicted. Despite all of the resentment that she had for Sam and Emily, she still cared for her cousin. She still _loved _Emily. She didn't want to hurt her again.

But she knew that sometimes, for the sake of survival, she had to be unbearably selfish.

"Emily, I didn't come here to resolve everything," she confessed quietly.

Emily looked at her questioningly, "What do you mean?"

"I . . ." Leah hesitated. Then she remembered how, just that morning, she had stood up to an entire coven of bloodthirsty, sadistically cruel leeches. She had single-handedly freed Jacob from a lifetime of servitude and pain. That strength did not disappear with the stupid vampires. She still _had _it.

"I'm still mad at you, Emily," Leah said bluntly, "I'm still mad at Sam. I'm still hurt and confused and bitter. A baby doesn't change that."

Emily looked down, her hand returning to her baby's forehead. She seemed to curl inside herself.

"I love you, Emily, and I always will. But you and Sam have done too much, intentionally or not, and I can't be a part of your lives anymore."

"Why not?" Emily's eyes shimmered with unshed tears, "Leah, all we want is for you to be happy."

"Then let me _go_," Leah smiled with pain, "Emily, being around you hurts me more than you know. You have _everything _I can't have. You have a husband – my first love, coincidentally – you have mortality, and you have a baby."

Emily looked confused.

"You have my life, Emily," Leah continued, "I was supposed to grow up, marry Sam, have a family, grow old and die with him. _That _was my life."

"That's my life," Emily whispered.

"Exactly," Leah glanced at the baby, "I can't have any of it. And being around it, constantly having to see what I'm missing, is unbearable. Do you understand?"

"Yes," a tear slid down Emily's scarred cheek, "I understand."

Leah felt a weight lift off of her, "So you won't be upset with me anymore for avoiding you?"

"I'll be sad, of course," Emily tried to smile, "I love you too, Leah. But I won't force you anymore. I'll avoid you, so that you don't hurt as bad."

Leah smiled, despite the guilt coursing through her veins, and hugged Emily and the baby. "_Thank you_," she said gratefully.

Emily patted her on the back, "I always forget how unhappy you are, Leah. How much I took from you. I didn't mean to hurt you, but I did."

"Yes, you did," Leah agreed.

Emily pulled back and gave her one last tragic smile, "You're welcome anytime, but I won't expect you anymore."

Leah stood, feeling buoyant despite the pain she had just caused Emily, "I know. That's all I need."

At that moment the backdoor creaked open, and Sam and Jacob reentered the cottage. Sam wore a self-satisfied smirk, and Jacob seemed vaguely irritated.

"I'm glad you finally see my point of view about the vampires," Sam continued in a slightly condescending tone, "I've been telling you for years that that imprint of yours was nothing but trouble."

"It wasn't like that," Jacob muttered under his breath.

Emily looked confused, and Leah just sighed inwardly. Of course Sam would somehow inject himself into the tumultuous events that occurred that morning.

Sam turned to Emily, and stopped dead in his tracks.

Leah saw his hands shake, once.

Jacob's face immediately became wary. He slid into a somewhat more defensive stance.

"What?" Leah demanded.

"Tears?" Sam asked, his voice oddly flat.

Oh, shit.

Of course Emily would cry, because she cried easily and was hormonal due to the baby. And of course Sam would see that, and jump to outlandish conclusions. Like Leah hitting her, or something.

Emily realized this too, and quickly wiped them away.

"Leah – _why is she crying_?" Sam growled.

"Don't blame me," Leah snapped automatically.

It was the wrong thing to say. Sam turned purple with rage and shook even harder, "_WHAT DID YOU DO?_"

"I didn't do anything!" Leah shrieked, furious with Sam. Right after she had come to peace with Emily, right after she had _finally _been honest with her cousin, Sam decided to ruin everything.

What an asshole.

"Sam, calm down," Jacob ordered.

"NO!" Sam howled, his baritone yell frightening the baby, "you always _do _this Leah! Make Emily cry, when she did _nothing_! This is all your fault! ALWAYS!"

Leah Claire began crying, her little wails piercing Leah's heart. Emily hushed her and rocked her, her attention entirely diverted from the mess at hand.

"Sam," Jacob repeated, his voice dangerously low, "stop it. Leah didn't do anything to Emily. She's fine – look at her."

"Emily never cries! Only over Leah!" Sam roared, "Leah is the only reason for Emily's pain. It's always her fault!"

"Fuck you, Sam," Leah spat. She was too angry to even think.

Emily hurriedly stood up, with the baby, and vanished into another room.

"Don't use foul language in front of my wife or my child," Sam snarled.

"Don't be a dick without reason," Leah retorted.

Sam clenched his fist and glared at her, hate etched into every line on his face. Leah had never seen him look at her like that before, as if she was a vile slime that corrupted innocent minds and broke happy hearts.

"I will kill you – I swear it – if you _ever _hurt her again," Sam finally said. He meant it.

Leah stood up violently, stung by the injustice of everything, and shook with rage, "God I hate you."

"Likewise," he snarled, "why are you such a bitter bitch, Leah? Why can't you just get over me, I really _don't _love you, and be kind to your beautiful, amazing cousin? She did nothing wrong!"

Quite possibly for the first time in years, Leah felt tears well up in her eyes.

She didn't cry. She never cried. Tears were for the weak, and Bella Cullen. Tears were signs of vulnerability.

Leah was not weak, vulnerable, or Bella Cullen.

And she hated that suddenly, her eyes were glistening, her heart was pounding, and her throat seemed stuck by the pure rage and hatred that clogged her windpipes.

Jacob saw it, and instantly stepped between them. "Leah, get in the car. I'll be right out."

Leah didn't follow orders either. Ever. So instead she crossed her arms, swallowed her emotion, and tried to shoot death rays out of her eyes.

Jacob turned around, his eyes pleading, and said, "Please Leah? I'll be right out. I just need to talk to Sam for a minute."

Suddenly, Leah realized what he was doing. He was _handling it_. Just as she had done for him with the spawn that morning, he was going to end this with Sam.

_End_ it.

So she gave Sam one more hateful glare, spun on her heel, and exited the house. She slammed the door behind her and heard the glass crack.


	11. Free

**Free**

Jacob exited the house about ten minutes after Leah. When he slammed the door, the glass shattered.

He got in the car, his hands shaking slightly, and shoved the key into the ignition. Within a few seconds he maneuvered the car out of the narrow driveway and shot down the tree-lined dirt road.

"Well?" Leah demanded.

He glanced at her, "It's done."

Leah felt a strange sense of reverse dejavu, and narrowed her eyes, "What happened?"

Even though he was angry, Jacob managed to crack a wide smile, "I told him to fuck himself in about twenty-three different ways."

Leah let her head fall back against the seat, and simply let his words wash over her. Nothing could have possibly made her feel better _except _for those words.

Emily would not hold that fight against Leah – she knew it was a long time coming. Her and Emily still had a peaceful, calm understanding, tinged with the bitterness of an unsolvable separation.

But Sam – Sam was probably writhing in the horrendous shit hole Jacob just gleefully threw him in.

In fact, Sam probably resembled the spawn right now. Nessie had been utterly mortified when Leah had dramatically stormed out. Sam was probably gagging on his own embarrassment.

"_God _that feels good," Leah glanced at him, "what did you say?"

"The short list or the long list?"

"The long list," Leah replied instantly.

Jacob grinned and swerved onto the highway that led away from Leah's house, up the road that hugged the cliffs and the great, sweeping Pacific Ocean.

"Well first, I told him he was being a hysterical child, and that tears and shouting were reserved for kids of Claire's age," Jacob chuckled, "then I told him that _he _made the baby cry, not you, and that you and Emily had just attempted to resolve your differences. That's why Emily was crying."

"That probably made him feel like a prat," Leah observed.

"Oh it did," Jacob assured her, "then, he tried to say that he was simply basing his reaction off of your previous behavior, and I asked him to come up with an example."

"Which obviously he couldn't, since I've never actually made Emily cry," Leah reasoned.

Jacob nodded, "Exactly. So then I told him he was an assuming idiot, and that he showed the least maturity out of all of you. Actually, I kind of hit below the belt here, by saying he was the most unfit leader for a pack I had ever seen in my entire life."

"Nice," Leah nodded.

"Then I said Emily and you were both too good for him, that he didn't deserve either of you, and that it was only by some higher power that Emily saw anything in him."

Leah wrinkled her forehead, "Pretty much."

"And then it got ugly," Jacob sighed, "he started going on and on about how you were only acting up because you were still in love with him, and how Sam couldn't do anything to make you stop. He actually said, and I quote, 'Leah's love for me is hurting her, Emily, and me. If she would just get over me, all these stupid problems would go away.'"

"That _asshole_," Leah exclaimed, outraged. She sat up straighter, wanting to punch a hole in the dashboard of her mother's car.

"I know, I know," Jacob said quickly, steering the car expertly to put her off balance, "I told him he was an egotistical jackass. I said you weren't in love with him, in fact you were repulsed by him, and that he was being completely moronic in assuming all of this revolved around him."

"And?"

"He didn't believe me," Jacob rolled his eyes, "he is so confident in the fact that you – both you and Emily – are madly in love with him, that he can't see the truth. So I . . . kind of lied."

Leah scowled, "Lied how?"

Jacob seemed vaguely uncomfortable. He fidgeted, even as the car drove precariously between the solid line of trees and the harsh cliff drop.

"Spit it out!"

"Okay, okay," Jacob glanced at her, "don't be mad, alright? It was for your own good. There was no way he was going to believe me otherwise."

Leah frowned impatiently. Jacob sucked in a deep breath, "I . . . kind of told him you had feelings for me."

_What?_

Leah prepared herself for that familiar feeling of fury to engulf her. She waited for the wave of wrath to overwhelm her entire being.

She hated it when people made decisions for her, and so she was utterly shocked when her heartbeat didn't quicken and her head stayed cool.

She wasn't angry.

"I'm not angry," she said aloud.

"Phew," Jacob beamed, "I thought for sure you'd gut me. But it was kind of funny – he didn't believe me. He was like, 'she could never love someone like _you_.'"

"What did you say?" she asked curiously.

"I said I was in your head all the time, I always knew what you were feeling, and it was just obvious to me. It was like how we always knew you loved Sam when were all in that pack. Eventually, he believed me. And he was so shocked he sat down."

Leah felt surprised too. Of all the crazy lies to tell, that one certainly would have knocked Sam off his feet. The only thing that Sam was sure about in the world was his own desirability.

Really, he probably considered himself a heartbreaker. His ego was swollen with the years of believing Leah was pining over him, even when he had someone as beautiful as Emily.

Jacob was a clever bastard, she had to give him that.

"So then what?" she asked.

"Then he muttered something that sounded like an apology, and I went into a tirade," Jacob smirked, "I told him he had to stay the hell away from you, that as your pack leader I would protect you from everything, and that he was no longer welcome in your home. And I told him that if he were to ever speak to you again – because you know he would have tried otherwise – I would kick his ass. Because we all know I could."

"Cocky, aren't we?" Leah said, though she was smiling.

"Around him? Yeah."

Jacob was flying. She could tell that he was utterly weightless at the moment. After being freed from his spawn, and then freeing Leah from her stupid ex, Jacob was understandably excited. He was practically bouncing in his seat.

"How'd it end?"

He beamed, "I told him to fuck himself. And then I left."

_Jacob Black, you are my hero_.

"And now?"

He shrugged, "We can do anything we want I guess. Nessie and Sam are both going to stay the hell away. The vampires are leaving, so we're not really even obligated to stay in La Push anymore."

Leah considered this.

In reality, he was right. The only thing holding them back before was the stupid spawn, who had been neatly eliminated from the picture, and Sam, who was probably having an excruciating paradigm shift in thought at that very moment.

So anywhere, anything . . . Leah felt a little overwhelmed by the possibilities.

"Well?" he asked her.

"Cliff diving," she decided randomly.

He grinned, "Adrenaline rush?"

"More or less," she smiled.

For the first time since childhood, Leah felt _free_. She no longer felt as if her identity stemmed from Sam and Emily's twisted relationship. She was Leah. Just Leah. And Leah could do anything she wanted to do.

And, for the first time since her heartbreak, Leah had a best friend. Jacob would do anything for her, and she would do anything for him.

She glanced at him, curiously, and saw how happy he really was. Light seemed to burst from every pore in his body. He was free as well – free from the overbearing, dramatic weight of Bella Cullen, free of his sadistic spawn, free of the presence of a coven of dysfunctional vampires.

They were both free.


	12. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

In an effort to truly be free from everything, Jacob and Leah moved out of the reservation. They rented a small house set far back from Forks and La Push and lived as roommates. Both began online college courses, and Jacob got a steady job at an auto shop in Forks.

Ultimately, he planned on opening his own auto repair shop. But the money was good, so Leah didn't give him too much crap about flaking out and working for a larger corporation.

Leah, because she hated the idea of being supported by anybody, began working as a waitress at one of the stupid little restaurants in Forks. She'd put on her apron, paste a fake smile on her face, and deal with needy customers for thirty hours a week. The money wasn't as good, but it was enough to pay for her share of rent and groceries.

They spent most of their time eating vast amounts of food, watching football games on their crappy TV, and bantering. Leah gave him shit about his grades, Jacob snapped that she was the messiest person he'd ever met. Together, they functioned.

Every night they would take wolf form and patrol the reservation and the town. Sometimes they ran separately, but most of the time they stayed together. They enjoyed each other.

When they ran into Sam or a member of his pack, they would ignore him. Sam was exiled from their pack of two, and they disliked dealing with a member of his brood. Only Seth was allowed to run with them.

Leah found herself settling into a pattern of comforting normalcy. She liked her classes, her goofy roommate, and her life. She loved that she had a friend she could count on. Her face no longer automatically adopted a bitter expression. Instead, she was frighteningly prone to smiling.

Ultimately, all of the Cullens returned to Forks except for Bella, Edward, and the spawn. Leah, surprisingly enough, didn't mind. They stayed out of her way and the Doc was good for the hospital.

Jacob asked the fortuneteller leech, once, why they hadn't stayed with the gruesome little family of three.

"They're honestly annoying," Alice wrinkled her nose, "I mean, we love them, but they need a century or two to adjust to each other before we can all live together again. Nessie is going through a rebellious phase, and Bella and Edward simply can't handle it like decent people."

Leah had roared with laughter at that one, and spent a good three weeks making fun of the situation with Jacob. Even Jacob was able to laugh about it, because he was finally over the pain of losing Nessie. He had accepted it.

"Poor Nahuel," he said once, shaking his head with a grin, "he'll be miserable for centuries."

Life was so normal for Leah, so easy, that she often couldn't remember how it had felt when she had survived only on the pain of losing a life she wanted more than anything. Only when she remembered her menopause, or heard Seth talking about his engagement with Amanda, would she occasionally feel a stab of loneliness.

One year after the Showdown, Leah and Jacob went cliff diving. It was their way of remembering the day they had helped each other break free. That day – which was unremarkable in every other way – had been a milestone. Since then neither the spawn nor Sam had tried to contact them.

Leah was so happy with Jacob, so exhilarated to be leaping off cliffs and diving into icy water, so content with her life, that she felt a wave of gooey joy sweep into her heart.

And when Jacob's large hands grabbed her cold, slippery waist and pulled her close, ignoring her drenched clothes and screeched protestations, she found she didn't care.

He searched her eyes, as if seeking approval, and then shrugged and kissed her anyway.

Really, Leah didn't mind.

So she kissed him back, and when he laughed and ruined it, pretended to be overwhelmed with joy.

But she had to get him back, because what kind of self-respecting female would she be if she let Jacob manhandle her, and get away with it?

So she pressed her palms flat against his chest and abruptly shoved him backwards. His body fell, with no grace whatsoever, and splashed into the ocean. Leah doubled over in laughter at the indignant look on his face when his head popped above the icy water.

Leah didn't need an imprint. She didn't need a formula on how to be a female werewolf.

All she needed was herself, her happiness, and her best friend Jacob.

So she leapt off the cliff, shrieked with joy, and let gravity carry her into the ocean.

**End.**


End file.
